Monica Lewinski's brain

Monica was hurrying down a crowded New York sidewalk when her knicker elastic suddenly snapped and her brain fell out. She looked around but couldn't find her brain anywhere.

So she decided to look for a shop that sold brains. Eventually she came across one which had two brains in the window: a man's brain on sale at $25 and a woman's brain on sale at $100.

'That's not fair!' she said, so she stormed into the shop.

'I want a new brain, but why are you charging four times as much for a woman's brain as for a man's brain?'

The shopkeeper smiled at her. 'Ah, well, you see Miss, we can't charge as much for the man's brain. It's been used.'

**************

What do you say to a woman with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice. (Submitted by Mark)

*************

What do you call 100 women at the bottom of the sea? A good start. (Submitted by Mark)

*************

How many sexists does it take to change a lightbulb? - None, let the bitch cook in the dark. (Submitted by Roxanne)

***************

What's the difference between pre-menstrual tension and B.S.E? - One's a mad cow disease, the other's an agricultural problem. (Submitted by Roxanne)

**************

Why does the bride always wear white? - Because it is good for the dishwasher to match the stove and refrigerator (Submitted by Roxanne)

**************

How many men does it take to open a beer? - None. It should be opened by the time she brings it. (Submitted by Roxanne)

**************

If your wife keeps coming out of the kitchen to nag at you, what have you done wrong? - Made her chain too long. (Submitted by Roxanne)

**************

How do you turn a fox into an elephant? - Marry it! (Submitted by Roxanne)