Alexandra Crew FC

The Gaffer

The Gaffer's main job, apart from picking the team, is to set the Saturday curfew, unfortunately he is usually the first to break it. Never been substituted in over 300 games for the team.

Presumin' Ed

All round good bloke who has played in all positions for the team but spends most of his time nowadays hanging around the penalty box either as a makeshift 'keeper or centre forward.

Tacklin' Bob

An original Six Bells footballer, Bob has one of the deadliest left feet in the business. Socks sponsored by Mycil.

Lazza

Larry played in the first game for The Six Bells and has never stopped running. Ever.

Bazza

His unorthodox playing style strikes fear and confusion amongst his team mates and opposition alike. He is the Duke of Edinburgh and races Coracles for a living.

Bunion Boy

Lee has ridden several winners on the horses and won the Suffolk 800m Championship at his first attempt. Lee would have scored less goals if his bunions hadn't redirected his miss-hit shots towards goal.

Jocky

Not only is Jocky from Scotland but he also rides horses for a living. His real name is Graham. Runs a modelling agency in his spare time.

JC

Not only is JC a football pin up boy but he is also something of a guitar legend in the Cambridge urban heavy funk music scene. Occasionally ventures out of his red mist.

Marvin Seabass

The Cyclops needs only one good eye to score many great headed goals from corners. Proves the maxim "Great midfielders don't die, they become centre backs."

Ali

Midfield general Ali signed his contract whilst wearing his kilt and in tears at his sister's wedding. Likes to go on holiday when The Crew make it through to a Cup Final.

Burninho

Three Dobblers Blokes overheard on Kingston St:
DB#1 "Wasn't that barman at The Alex their centre forward?
DB#2 "Yeah, great player."
DB#3 "Can't pour a decent pint though."

Jenko

A hero of our championship winning seasons and is occasionally persuaded to dust of his boots when the boys are short.

The Riddler

Journey man Dave has travelled the world plying his trade in the African and Dutch versions of the Friendly League. Scored an o.g. on his debut.

Smokin' Joe

Joe once injured himself by bending over to pick up a packet of Marlboro Reds. Happily, Joe has fully recovered and his physio treatment allows him to safely smoke as many Marlboro Reds before kick-off as possible.

Gary Gary Gary

Gary brings pace and a powerful shot into the ageing Alex Crew squad. His dad is the only person ever to say anything tactically sound at half time. Nobody listened.

Matt The Surgeon

Matt's incisive runs cut to the heart of the opposition defences. A clinical finisher with a good bedside manner.

Le Tallack

A fine tackler and a scorer of great goals, at least on paper. Would be playing for the Liverpool FC Reserves if it wasn't for an avoidable administration error at immigration.

Matt The Cat

The nearest thing we have to a proper 'keeper. Nicknamed The Cat not for his reflexes but for his penchant for a warm bowl of milk before kick-off.

D

Newest and youngest player to play for The Crew for some time and the only player good enough to wear red boots and not be laughed at.