Alex Crew Match Reports - Season 2002-03

These match reports were written by either players or spectators at our matches. They may or may not be an accurate reflection of the match, the only criteria for publication is a favourable mention for the web-site bloke.

Alexandra Crew 1 - 2 Zebra, Sunday 18th May 2003, League, Latham Rd, ©JC

Summary: Excellent in defence, frighteningly lacking up front (despite the odd dip from distance by Tacklin' Bob). The offside trap worked well until the linesman went to sleep in the second half.

Tackling back from midfield was excellent. A debut from King Nobby at the ripe old age of 49 couldn't help us despite his tireless covering. Goal (singular) came from a 20-yard overhead fizzer from Seabass (if he meant it).

Pitch Report: "It took a stud".
Team Performance: Laboured.
Alex Man of the Match: Nobby (I dare you to deny him the glory).
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Alexandra Crew 2 - 3 Exiles, Thursday 15th May 2003, League, Latham Rd, ©JC

Summary: Consistently outhustled by the team at the foot of the table. Every Exile challenge was a debatable yellow card offence. A lenient first half referee (no names) was followed by a more assertive one which resulted in a tighter game - also aided by the fact that Matt Le Chat was on top form between the sticks. Moment of the match is divided between where Mark "Wingnut" Tallack was upended a good three seconds after he'd dispatched the ball to safety, and the Rudi Voller-Frank Riijkard gobbing re-enactment. Goals from a yard from Edmundo, Tony Jenko from a little further, and I blinked for the other.

Pitch Report: Hard enough for flats.
Team Performance: Lacking in most areas, especially the passing.
Alex Man of the Match: Matt The Cat
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Waggon & Horses 0 - 2 Alexandra Crew, Sunday 11th May 2003, League, Coldhams Common, ©JC

Summary: Two goals from Gary's bulleted corners. One direct through flying bodies. One deflected by Howie's unwitting bonce. A whole heap of tense tactical football between each goal.

Pitch Report: Yep, there was definetly a pitch.
Team Performance: Yep, there was one of these too.
Alex Man of the Match: Well, it's gotta be Gary Gary Gary if just for his corners.
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Darley Stud 2-2 Alexandra Crew , 6th April 2003, League, Saxon St, ©JC

A possible league decider this one. With the added spice of the cup match a couple of weeks back still coursing through the veins, it was tin-hats strapped firmly in place and GAME ON. Darley started the brighter and spent longer periods in the Alex half of the field, but with the Crew employing their counter-attack to good effect on the odd occasion the game was still on a knife-edge. After twenty or so minutes of vigilant Alex defending a Darley corner to the back post broke the deadlock with the ruddy-faced one they call Jimmy beating his marker Matt to power in a bullet-header just inside post and crossbar.

From here the game swung the other way, as the whites turned up the heat. Ali began to win header after header with D securing the second ball and playing it deftly to feet. Matt's surgeon (sic) runs began to push the defence back and with the opposition on the back-foot Howie's pace came into play. The Gaffer found more space and crosses began to swing in from all directions.

Eventually the pressure told and from a corner Seabass swang screaming onto the penalty spot and powered a free header down and into the Darley net.

Into the second-half, more Alex pressure, superb ball from D to Matt, to Gary, to Sean, to Howie and his cross-shot from the edge of the area thundered in. All Hail to the Alex! Then, all hands to the pump as Darley came right back, pushing extra men into attack. And that's how it stayed until the end. Wave after wave of Darley attack, broken up by the occasional long clearance. Until the equalizer. Then, the game became more spread allowing Matt to make the surge of the game - from deep defence through midfield, red and black shirts attempting tackle after tackle and failing, until eventually he laid the ball back for a wayward shot. He visibly paused and looked round to find himself in the opposition's area. An incredible run beating five, nay six, Darley men.

There was only time for two golden chances to wrap it up. One for Darley blazed over the bar, and a 1 on 1 for Howie screwed wide. But 2-2 seemed fair. Another one for the annals of Friendly League history.

Pitch report: Firm
Team performance: Defence **** Midfield **** Attack ***
Alex Man of the Match: Matt the Surgeon
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Cambridge Cosmos Thirds 0 - 5 Alex Crew, 30th March 2003, League, Birdwood Road, Cambridge, ©JC

A superb team performance dominated from midfield. To be honest Cosmos won nothing in the air from the first kick - even the Gaffer won one in the air! (That's me dropped). Ali was able to send every goalkick back from whence it came with knobs on, and Tacklin' Bob and the Gaffer did a fine job of securing the second ball on the deck. Howie's runs were both blistering and at fine angles keeping the opposition's defence in constant disarray. Matt's surging runs and tackling back were excellent. The icing on the cake was a rock-solid defence and a clean sheet to boot - special mentions for JC (see Ali) and Seabass. Goals that are emblazoned on the memory are by Gary from the edge of the area, and the final flourish from Howie "Burninhio" Blackburn sweeping in from the left in an arc onto a deft Bob through-ball, rounding the keeper and slotting into the empty net. Other goals came and went (I blame my eyesight, with my memory as a backup) for not mentioning them.

Pitch rating: Flat (by Sunday morning standards). [Editor's Note - What about all the tyre tracks and sand pits in the penalty box?]
Team rating: Back to something like our best.
Alex Man of the Match: Burninhio
[Editor's Note - What about the bit when Matt nutmegged the guy who then tackled him 1970's style?]
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We lost in extra-time. There were incidents.

Pitch rating: Dry, slanty.
Team rating: Greatly improved team defending & passing.
Alex Man of the Match: Marvin Seabass
[Editor's Note - JC's still upset by some of the "incidents". He fails to mention that The Riddler saved a penalty, we had one good penalty appeal turned down and were later awarded a less obvious penalty which Howie "sportingly" passed wide of the post. Matt and Jimmy called each other names, JC and the Big Bloke squared up to each other, and then it got really ugly when someone accused Ali of cheating. After 90 minutes it was 2-2 and so into Golden Goal extra-time. Darley started losing players due to work commitments, we came close to scoring several times, they scored, game over. Everyone shook hands and agreed that the other team deserved to win. Vintage Sunday Morning Football.]
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Well, not vintage Crew by any stretch of the imagination. Despite fine support again from Cath and the boy Callum, the Alex boys struggled to get a good early rhythm against a hyped-up Dobblers team, who were keen to escape the relegation battle at the foot of Division One. This resulted in losing two early goals for the second game in succession. Both came from punted balls catching the crooked Alex backline unawares, subsequent goalline scrambles and poor closing down, ending in simple tap-ins. This seemed to spur on the busy midfield pairing of Tony and Ali who provided balls out wide which Gaffer Grady pushed on to the perpetual motion that was Burninhio. But it was a spot of ill-fortune that changed the scoreline, with the Dobblers striker pouncing on a loose ball and Matt the Cat unable to hold his low shot, scooping it into the Alex net. Before half-time however, some good pressure enabled the boys in Black and White to bundle the ball in from a corner, Ali getting two bites of the cherry, slamming the second home. Half-time: 3-1 down.

The second half was slightly better, although it was still the Dobblers with more of the pressure, Ed and Burn having nothing but scraps to feed on. The Alex defence dropped further and further back with Tacklin' Bob manfully filling in the holes. Occasionally Coracle Barry and The Riddler banged balls forward which began moves but it was all looking a bit too much to hope for a turn around. In the end, they scored another, followed by Ali smacking a post from a free-kick and JC nearly bunding the ball in on the rebound, part-timer Tony scoring with a close-range header from a Gaffer corner, before the Dobblers wrapped it up with a good goal scored by their fastest, youngest and most impetuous player chipping Matt after a deft lofted throughball.

It ended: Dobblers 5-2 Alex Crew.

Pitch rating: Uneven, dry, bobbly.
Team rating: Good individual efforts, poor teamwork and decision-making.
Alex man of the match: Ali McCluskey
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