A Moment in the life of...

Well, thanks to modern technology, The Big C is now able to bring you an insight into the world of the football player, and what goes on in his mind.

Of course for some players, a lot less goes on than for others.

Guy Kersey (running back)

Ok. That's the opening kickoff out of the way. Time to play some serious football. I run out onto the field, and have a sneaky look to see if there are any cameras. If there are, I pose briefly, before entering the huddle.

The play is called and it is a run, with me to carry the ball. Nice. I break the huddle in my usual jovial mood, and drop down into a 3 point stance, just letting by backside bob up and down a couple of times in a provocative manner for all the wives and girlfriends that are watching.

The Red Bull I drank in preparation for the game has taken effect, and it's now been almost 4 days since I blinked, so I feel ready. The ball is snapped, and I get a fantastic start on the play. I am out of my stance very quickly, and and got a hold of the ball nice and early enabling me to read the defense.

What I read is 4 defensive linemen, and 2 linebackers, who have somehow come unblocked, and are about to jump on me, so I do the only sensible thing - I try to hurdle them.

Unfortunately, the linebacker is 6 feet 2, and I fail to hurdle his thighs, and so I am crushed under a pile of bodies 4yds in the backfield. One of the defensive lineman is looking at me funny.

I think I hear the linebacker mutter something about me after the play, so I throw the ball down, and launch myself at the entire defense. I throw a few punces, before I am dragged away, and sent to the sideline by the coach.

I take my helmet off, and fling it as far as I can manage, then take my shoulder pads off and slam them to the ground. I scream "Why does everyone hate me??!!" then add a string of obscenities.

Probably for good measure I will push a few of my smaller friends around.