Star Trek 6: The Undiscovered Country
The Klingon homeworlds' main power reactor on their moon Praxis
explodes, a la Chernobyl, with similar potentially devastating effects.
This is detected by the USS Excelsior, under the command of Commander Sulu.
Yes, finally one of the old Enterprise crew has been promoted off the ship!
Actually he is not the only one: his Communications Officer is Janice Rand [
Grace Lee Whitney
]. The other familiar face in Sulu's crew is Christian Slater
[Name of the Rose], who pops up as Sulu's aide.
Since the Cold War against the Klingons was a metaphor for the Cold War against the USSR, this film mirrors the political thaw that occurred in real life. Kirk is ordered by his boss, Admiral Cartwright [Brock Peters], to meet with the Klingon peace delegation. He takes the Enterprise, with all the old crew [except Sulu and Rand, of course]. Also along for the ride is Spock's protege Valeria [ Kim Cattrall ]. The part was originally meant to be the character Saavik played by Kirsty Alley and Robin Curtis in the previous films, but for some reason the makers decided to change this.
The Klingons are led by Chancellor Gowron [David Warner - TMNT 2 - he was Human Ambassador in ST5: Final Frontier, a Cardassian in Star Trek: TNG and a human in Babylon 5 ] and General Chang [Christopher Plummer]. Friendly banter is had by all, and the Klingons display a love of Shakespeare. Apparently they think he was one of them. Anyway, after the dinner has ended and the Klingons have returned to their ship, the Klingon ship is bombarded and boarded - presumably by the Enterprise. The unknown killers leave Gowron for dead. Kirk and McCoy beam across to help, but Chang blames them and has them arrested.
Federation President [Kurtwood Smith - Robocop ] complains to the Klingon Ambassador [John Herman Munster - Babylon 5 ], but to no avail. Spock's father is present, still Vulcan Ambassador after all these years! Kirk and McCoy are put on trial, defended by Worf [Michael Dorn, playing the grandfather of his character in ST: TNG ]. The frame-up is perfect, and they are sentanced to life imprisonment in a gulag, a Cold War reference to Siberia. There they meet the babelicious Iman [David Bowie's wife], who promises to help them escape.
Incredible Hulk Returns, The
David Banner has built a machine which he thinks can cure him of his
transformations. However, mercenary Tim Thomerson [Trancers] and his
sidekick Charles Napier [
Austin Powers
] are plotting to steal the device.
Banner's sidekick is a young doctor who has the power to summon the mystical norse warrior, Thor. Yes, this is a complete butchery of the original Marvel comics - but what the hell, it's fun.
Tremors II: Aftershock
The Graboids are back in business, this time chewing up Mexican oil workers.
Kevin Bacon's character is unavailable because he has a fine woman,
presumably
Reba McIntyre
's character. However, Fred Ward's character needs the money ...
He has a younger sidekick in Bacon's mould,
There is yet another babelicious female geologist in tight-fitting jeans -
Helen Shaver
, who is reminiscent of
Kate Mulgrew
[Janeway in
Star Trek: VGR
] and the October 1974 Playmate. Since the average viewer was probably born in
Summer 1974, this is quite a confession!
The rest of the crew includes the psychotic survivalist from the first film
and a couple of expendable hispanic guys.
The ass-kicking proceeds well, and the guys make headway into the 2-dozen plus monsters that have been detected. However, they find themselves up against something even worse, courtesy of Tippett Studios [who created the AT-ST and ED-209]. The explanation of how these creatures appear [spontaneous evolution!] is ridiculous, but then the film isn't meant to be brain-taxing.
Bill & Ted's Excellent Adventure
Bill and Ted [Alex Winters and Keanu Reeves] are a couple of American
high-school geeks. They will fail their finals if they cannot deliver an
excellent history presentation tomorrow.
Luckily for them Rufus [a cool guy from the future] lends them his
time traveling phone booth.
This enables them to collect various historical personalities such as Socrates
[who makes a reference to US TV soap opera Days of Our Lives].
This is the film that lead to Reeves becoming a major movie star. He's so good at being a clueless Californian dead-head ... almost as if he isn't acting at all.
Monty Python and the Holy Grail
The title says it all.
King Arthur [Graham Chapman] bands together a group of knights,
the Kights of the Round Table. God [AKA a
Terry Gilliam
animation] orders them to seek the Holy Grail.
This results in lots of infamous sketches where the knights run into sundry
perils such as the knights who say Niii.
The soundtrack includes the theme tune from Where Eagles Dare. UK SF novelist Ian M Banks was apparently one of the extras in the final scene.
Spacehunter: Adventures in the Forbidden Zone
Peter Strauss plays an interstellar bounty hunter who lands on a remote
planet to rescue 3 babes [including
Deborah Pratt
] who escaped there from a stellar cruise liner that crashed.
He teams up with a teenage scavenger girl [
Molly Ringwald
].
The babes are captured by arch-villain Overdog [Michael Ironside - V ], a hideously disfigured cyborg. Ernie Hudson is the token black guy, who ends up helping Strauss.
Robin Hood: Men in Tights
Yet another
Mel Brooks
parody, this time of Kevin Costner's Hollywood blockbuster
Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.
Cary Elwes plays the title character. He starts out in a Saracen prison,
but escapes with the help of Isaac Hayes [
Escape From New York
]. Once back in Merrie England he discovers that his family lands have been
taken by the evil Sheriff of Rottingham [Roger Rees - Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot!]
Lost World: Jurassic Park 2
Yet another
Steven Spielberg
dinosaur extravaganza, again based loosely on a novel by
Michael Crichton
. Jeff Goldblum is back, recruited by Attenborough to lead a team exploring
the SECOND island with dinosaurs on it. While Goldblum and the audience know
that things are going to end badly, nobody else seems to care.
Julianne Moore plays Goldblum's girlfriend, who thinks that because she photographed some lions in a game reserve once she can camp out near carnivorous dinosaurs without being in any jeopardy whatsoever. Also, as always in this kind of film, there's a cute kid that comes along for the ride.
In the first film the British big-game hunter was played by Bob Peck [ Slipstream ]. Here, a very similar character is played by Pete Postlethwaite [The Usual Suspects]. He leads a well-armed group of big-game hunters, but, thanks to the stupidity of one of Goldblum's team, all the humans on the island are trapped at the mercy of the dinosaurs! And when the T Rexs finally chomp down on human flesh, the CGI gore is far worse than anything else the PG-13 certificate would imply.
Comedy of Terrors, The
This is like a sitcom version of
Roger Corman
's adaptations of
Edgar Allen Poe
's works. Vincent Price plays an undertaker, unhappily married to a buxom
blonde. Boris Karloff is the father-in-law, and Peter Lorre is the underling
with desires for Price's wife. Only fair, as Price seduced Lorre's wife in
The Black Cat.
It is wonderful to see Price strut and Lorre bumble as they go about their fiendish work.
Arrival, The
Charlie Sheen is a Contact-type scientist who detects a signal he
believes to be of extra-terrestrial origin.
He informs the US Government, in the form of slimy bureaucrat Ron Silver [
Timecop
], but the result is a coverup. Incidentally, one of the MIB goons also plays
a FBI agent in the TV show
The Visitor
. Meanwhile,
Lindsay Crouse
discovers that global warming has been on the increase in recent years,
with potentially catastrophic results.
They both end up in Mexico, apparently the source of both the signal and the
heatwave.
Yes, it appears that cool-looking CGI aliens are doing a They Live.
The high points? Well, Teri Polo plays Sheen's GF. The plot's pretty good [although it seems predictable towards the end, there's a good twist], and there's a great action scene involving a bath-tub.
Beetlejuice
As you can probably guess from the zany title, this was directed by
Tim Burton
.
Geena Davis and her husband die in an accident, and become ghosts. A new family move into their home, and the only one who can see the undead couple is teenage goth chick Winona Ryder.
The ghosts call upon the title character [played by Michael Keaton] to exorcise the unwanted living people from the house. Unfortunately he exceeds his mandate and tries to marry Winona.
Black Shield of Falworth
This is one of
Michael Sheard
's favourite films.
Tony Curtis plays a young peasant in medieval England who is destined for
greatness. This is total Hollywood hokum, famous for Curtis purportedly saying
Yondah is the castle of my faddah in his strong New York accent.
The truth is, that line is not in the film - and quite an entertaining piece
of hokum it is, too!
Curtis' character's love interest is played by his RL wife Janet Leigh .
Nightmare Before Christmas, The
This was produced by
Tim Burton
and based on a story written by him.
Jack Skellington, the Pumpkin King [voiced by Chris Sarandon - Fright Night ] is King of Hallowe'en land. While in a fit of depression he stumbles across Christmas-Land, and forms a plan. He kidnaps Santa and replaces him ...
Independence Day
This is the blockbuster Star Wars rip-off made by the team of writer-director
Roland Emmerich
and writer=producer Dean Devlin.
Basically, aliens attack planet Earth - and only the Yanks can save us!
The story is split between 3 protagonists in 3 cities.
There's even an unlikely cameo by Brent Spiner [ Star Trek: TNG ].
Fury, The
This is a late 1970s thriller by
Brian de Palma
, a sort of follow-up to Carrie.
Kirk Douglas plays a retired secret agent who wants to rescue his son
[Andrew Stevens] from the clutches of one-armed Control [John Cassavettes -
Rosemary's Baby
].
Amy Irving and Carrie Snodgrass provide the babe factor. Daryl Hannah also has a small supporting role. Dennis Franz pops up briefly as an off-duty uniformed cop.
Octopussy
This was written by
George MacDonald Fraser
[best known for the Flashman historical novels] and directed by
John Glen
Like the previous film,
For Your Eyes Only
, this was based on 3 of Fleming's short stories.
The title role is played by the babelicious Maud Adams , who had the distinction of being a Bond girl twice. Kristina Waybourn plays Magda, her equally babelicious blonde sidekick. Her partner Kemal Khan [Louis Jordan] is secretly plotting with renegade Ruskie General Steven Berkoff - remember, the cold war was very much active when this film was made.
Goldfinger
This is the much-loved third film in the Bond series.
The first 2 were merely spy films; this is the first one that was what we now
regard as a Bond film.
Sean Connery is excellent as Bond, while Honor Blackman appears as Pussy Galore - the villain's henchwoman, whose icy lesbian exterior is melted by Bond's manly charms.
Thunderball
Sean Connery is Bond again.
He is recalled from the detox clinic because SPECTRE have stolen 2 nukes from
the RAF. However, he realises that by strange coincidence he had been at the
same detox clinic as the SPECTRE agents!
He heads to the Bahamas to investigate Daniella Bianchi , based on nothing more than the fact she was sister to a SPECTRE victim. Of course, she looks good in a bikini so nobody complains.