Planning Department

Motto: We Get Things Done Eventually

Page 2

Welcome!

 

The Order of the Bed Planning Department is the most important department in the Order. We plan strategies for the OB, including our famous ideas for the Wye Valley Railway (below) and how the other departments should sort out their business (procurement of equipment, asset sorting, disposals, where the next pay packet is going to come from, and other such stuff). In order to raise some money, we also offer a number of useful services to help you plan things - at very competitive rates 1, although results are not guaranteed and, for legal purposes, it will not be counted as a "must follow" action plan2. This service will involve us planning your shopping trip, computer destruction project, company revival scheme or major atrocity, telling you how we would go about it, and (if applicable) passing your details onto the police 3.

The Planning Department is also in the enviable position of being able to claim to offer jobs for life 4. Our careers offer long-term opportunities 5 with many exciting challenges awaiting you 6. There is currently no uniform policy and no office; employees work from home and are contacted by email 7.

The Planning Department is generally short of money, so all generous donations are be accepted as long as they are legal, traceable, from decent people, and without strings attached 8. The Order of the Bed is not noted for ease of corruption, and we are quite willing to take £4,000,000 from you one day and knock your house down the next (unless you gave it to us so that we would knock your house down, whereupon we will pass the sum to a deserving preserved railway 9).

 

  1. At cost price or not much above.
  2. Which means you can't sue us if it all goes belly-up.
  3. If not applicable then your details will be destroyed once we have received payment.
  4. Nobody has left yet because nobody will want to employ them.
  5. You won't get anything extra in the next ten years.
  6. Trying to get the boss to give you a pay rise in line with inflation.
  7. This means that our IT person is responsible for not losing your work rather than the Post Office.
  8. Consequently we are yet to accept a donation.
  9. There are plenty out there, and they all want money for something.

_____________________________________________________________

Plans:

>>>Wye Valley Railway Plans>>>

>>>The railway from Monmouth to Pontrilas>>>

>>>Other Railways in and around Monmouth>>>

>>>Engineering Dep.>>>

>>>Railways Department>>>

>>>Why you need to plan - A Short Silly Story>>>

<<<<HOME PAGE<<<<

08/12/08