Well, here we go, the first non-ff.net chapter of Beauty and the beast ^-^ I hope I get asked lots more fun questions here.
Xelloss: Or not.
Filia: Not is good.
Lina: is it time for dinner yet?
No, but I can smell mine ^-^
Lina: You'd better share some of that.
Amelia: Miss Lina's scary...
Gourry: And smal.......
Lina: FIREBALL!!
Zelgadiss: How over used that joke is, has been and always will be. *sigh*
Valgaav: *fetches coffee for himself and Zelgadiss* -.-;; it's gonna be a long fic.
Zelgadiss: I noticed.
Xelloss: Idea.... *lowers voice* We could ambush author-san and then escape.
Filia: Nobody wants to follow up an idea by him right?
Xelloss: Meanie.
Zelgadiss: What a mature conversation. *sips coffee*
Well... Will you people get your act together? Lets move on with some questions, eh?
Xelloss: Question for author-san!!
...what?
Xelloss: Don't you think it's cruel to make the cast answe....
Not at all! n.n lets carry on.... Here we go... question for Xellie...
Xelloss: Who's Xellie?
Gourry: *points at Zelgadiss*
Question for purple Xellie... Xelloss ...if you and Filia were trapped in a dimension where there were only dragons on that planet, and you had no powers whatsoever to kill them off or anything...would you consider becoming nice towards the dragon race? ALSO May I add that in this dimension Zelas isn't there to order you to like..kill dragons...or anything. ^^ Oh also another thing to add...^__^ I'm a big fan of you!!
Xelloss: n.n Big Fan... makes me feel all warm and fuzzy inside....
Valgaav: Knowing him... that fuzzy feeling is indigestion from the last 'big fan' he ate....
That didn't answer the question did it? Answer it....
Xelloss: Well.... of course n.n If there were only dragons on the planet and I was on the planet, I would, therefore, be a dragon. And I'd have to be nice. There. Answered.
Can't argue with him, he has answered it. Anyways... Amelia, did you create the Vis Farank?
Gourry: What's a Vis Farank?
Lina: Aaaaaah! it's that stupid spell for smacking baddies with fists!! Can't you even remeber a simple thing like that? And give my chicken back! *dust cloud fight ensues*
Amelia: Lina-san.... it's not very just to beat Gourry-san up... he can't help being stupid.
Zelgadiss: Isn't it unjust to call people stupid? *sips Coffee*
Valgaav: But it's also unjust to lie
Zelgadiss: True. *sips coffee in unison with Val*
And how do you say 'Life is wonderful' in Japanese? 'zen zen subarashii desu' , I believe. Oh, also Amelia-sama, please consider listening to a person's side before forming an opinion. That's TRUE justice.
Lina: Besides, it's my job to say stuff like that!
Amelia: That's because mean you're mean Lina-san!
*shuffles papers* I pick on Ameila because.... She annoys me n.n Naga annoys me, but I don't pick on her.... o.o She might laugh at me!! So... the one out there who threatened to cut off Lina's hair and replace it with Xelloss' wig ....
Lina / Xelloss: HEY!
Calm down you two.... jeez... Valgaav, who is your favourite slayer besides Gaav and dragons? Namely who's your fav human? And yes Zelgadiss-sama is Human.
Valgaav: hmmm.... favourite... Well, let me think... human... Xelloss!
Xelloss: I'm not human n.n
Valgaav: No, but you were poking me with something purple.
Xelloss: I like purple n.n
Valgaav: It suits you, you're a big plum >>
Xelloss: And you look like a christmas tree.
Valgaav: You only say that because your dorky little pudding bowl haircut pales in comparison to the coolness of my hair...
Xelloss: But mine is shiny ^^
Valgaav: And you're a fruitcake.
Xelloss: Lizard ^^
Valgaav: okay then, you're a lizard.
Xelloss: not me, you are....
Aren't they kawaii when bickering? Mind you, I think this fight will go on forever, let's see.... next question.... *ducks pie thrown by audience member* I resent this, I am not Unjust! Amelia is unjust!
Amelia: Author-saaaaaaaaaaaan!
Quiet... one more word out of you and its... its... Gaav/Amelia fiction on my to do pile.
All: o.o *silence*
Xelloss: Not only that, but someone stuck an ice cream cone on your head.
Valgaav: Better than BEING an ice cream cone.
Xelloss: Tasty all over, that's me ^.~
Valgaav: uuuurg....
Well, I told ya this would keep going for a while. I better finish it though... XELLOSS!! Answer these next two questions or I'll make you watch "The new improved of Adventures of Barney the purple Dinosaur and his visit to Disney World."
Xelloss: *sits up to attention* Fire away Author-san!
Right, first off... What's your take on the possibility of having a sibling?
Xelloss: Fooooooood! ^^
Did I mention these answers have to be satisfactory?
Xelloss: Nope ^^ but since you're in that kind of vengeful, scary... and all mighty fantastic best ever author mode, I'll revise my answer. Depends on the sibling. I'd like one I could boss around and bully ^^ because I'm number one!
Gourry: *raises hand* Uhh.... thinking of which, I need a number one and a number two....
Valgaav: Number two is right there Gourry *points at Xelloss*
Xelloss: ... Author-san... Stop making them pick on me. Or, I'll go on strike.
At which point I'll make Valgaav my favourite muse.
Xelloss: Whats the next question?
Gourry: Where's the bathroom?
Xelloss: Good question! It's a secret.
Gourry: But!
No, it's over there. Hurry Gourry. Xelloss next question... Have you...
Xelloss: Wait, I answered the next TWO like you said...
I meant from me. *Issues warning look* have you ever gotten into Zelas-sama's stash and consequentally drunk?
Xelloss: *Shakes head* And if I had I don't think I'd remember, there's some potent stuff down there.
Slip me a couple of bottles and I'll do you a request fic ^^
Xelloss: Get it yourself.
Eh, fine, Lina... Where on Earth do you manage to buy clothes like that?
Lina: Earth... I don't.
Oh jeez, don't ANY of you give straight answers?
Zelgadiss: It would appear not.
*sigh* Well fine, I see what goes on around here. Won't let me run an organised fic will you? No. Xelloss, take over for me. I'm going to get some caffine.
Xelloss: bai bai Author-san! *Waves and doesn't notice author-san's favourite author sneak on set and give Filia cat ears and cat tail, Zelgadiss duck feet and beak, Amelia gets butterfly antennae and wings, she puts a jellyfish costume on Gourry, a peacock tail on Lina and cow horns and tail on Valgaav. Finally, Digi-Riven manages to put bunny ears and tail on Xelloss... and none of the crew notice O.o*
Xelloss: Okay folks, thank you for attending The Truth Behind Beauty and The Beast Debate fic, I hope you all had a thoroughly awful time and by the way, the rice cakes were indeed laced with laxatives. So if you would all form an orderly queue for our one cubicle unisex toilet who would be delighted to take your waste...
Valgaav: *shakes head*
Gourry: *Whines* But I just went!!
Lina: They were laced with what?!
Zelgadiss: Typically ridiculous....
Gourry: What's a laxatives?
Lina: O.o *whispers to Gourry* that's what! You Jellyfish!!!!!
Gourry: o.o Why would someone do that?
Valgaav: Xelloss wants to make himself some friends >>;;
Xelloss: *Facefaults* Well, at least I wouldn't have to go to the ZOO to make friends!
Valgaav: nope, just the local cess pit.
Xelloss: *rolls up sleeves* Bring it on.
... I leave the fic for a few minutes and ... SIT DOWN, NO FIGHTING AND SHUT UP!
Xelloss: *bounds back to his seat* Just you wait until this fic is finished....
Gourry: *using Lina's tail as a fan*
Zelgadiss: What in the blazes....? *removes animal parts* ...
Valgaav: .... *also removes animal parts closely imitated by everyone else except Gourry and Xelloss*
Xelloss: Why do I get the bunny? *tugs ears* ... come off! *tugs again* Why won't they come off?
Valgaav: *hides L-sama strength superglue behind his back*
Okay next questions..... last of the day....
Filia would you think dragons are a Chaotic Order?
Filia: There's nothing Chaotic about us.
Xelloss: nooooo nothing at all Filia ^^
Filia: just WHAT is that supposed to mean?
Xelloss: Well, that is.....
Filia: Go on, say it's a secret! I dare you!
Xelloss: no ^^
Filia: Ohoho.... why not?
Xelloss: Beacuse you told me to, I do take orders from dragons.
Audience member: That's my boy!
Xelloss, mazoku are and Ordered Chaos then?
Xelloss: You could say that.
Okay, what does everyone else have to say about that?
Lina: Get out of that stupid costume Gourry!
Gourry: But it's comfortable
Zelgadiss: ...
Amelia: Where did those costumes come from any way?
Valgaav: Looks like no one was listening
... Never mind. ^^;;; So if anyone has any questions, hurl them at me, and I'll throw them at the group. I even have the Dark Lords don't forget, and I can get ANYONE in here! But at the end of the day, the topic is Xelloss/Lina.... I mean Xelloss/Filia. Do you think Martina was an option? How about Yaoi? any questions regarding that? ... Commercial break! See ya next chapter!!
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Dynast: ....
Dynast: ....
Dynast: .... I refuse to do a stupid commercial. *Walks off*
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^^;; Dragons are a chaotic order and mazoku are ordered chaos are Digi-Riven's lines.... Don't steal them with out giving her credit ^^