Why do I constantly bait this woman?  If we prick her does she not bleed?  Is her vagina really full of knives?

Plus Isambard Kingdom Brunel has to draw blueprints for the kind of erection she gives me.  Not really of course, he's dead.  Fred Dibnah helps me through nowadays.

Coming soon:

The Curse of The Weakest Link pen.
The Swiss Family Robinsons.
My lesbian affair with Angela Landsbury
Something funny (yeah, that's what'll happen)