| Growing older
can lead to mental distress resulting from loneliness, illness, and lack of income
- a situation no different for LGB than for heterosexual elderly. Indeed, research
into the needs of elderly gays suggests that they might be better equipped than
their heterosexual contemporaries. However, until recently they have been an invisible
group, ignored by gerontologists whose research into the elderly means only the
heterosexual elderly and at the same time overlooked in research on homosexuality
that focuses on the young. Challenging
myths
What
information there is challenges myths about sexuality and the ability of LGB people
to adapt to the aging process. The stereotype image of the older gay man or lesbian
as depressed, isolated, desperate, and sexless doesn't hold up when you look at
the available evidence . Raymond Berger's classic book 'Gay & Gray' suggests
the contrary with some wonderful personal stories of full and acitive lives. He
submits that because they had to face crisis earlier in life like coming out and
role adaptation, elderly gays are more able to cope with aging than his or her
heterosexual counterpart. Age
stigma
Of
course age can be a stigma in itself. The loss of good looks and vitality can
lead to a drop in self esteem. Elderly gays may have to face discrimination from
family members or from younger gays who wish to exclude them from bars and organisations.
This is a pity as the elderly may have much wisdom to offer and it is also a group
to which we all aspire. Integration
into gay community beneficial
Confirming the findings
of Raymond Berger and others, a study by S Deevy in 1990 of lesbian women found
most women reported excellent health and positive attitudes toward their own aging
. Similarly Jean Quam reports: "Persons integrated into the gay community
have been shown to be more self-accepting, less depressed, less fearful of aging
and happier". Individuals find that retirement can afford them the opportunity
to be more involved socially and politically than before as disclosure as a homosexual
is unlikely to eliminate their financial livelihood. In
'Gay & Gray,'Raymond Berger suggests that "the quality of life as an
individual ages is determined less by his (or her) sexual orientation and more
by factors that affect older persons in general - health, finances and social
support." These factors are enough to lead to depression
and suicide amongst older gays. Suggestions of where
older LGB people can find help and support are offered below. Agencies
In the UK there are
organisations like Age
Concern with their Opening
Doors programme and London based Polari
who help find services or advice you may need; there are social and dating groups
like Caffmos In other
parts of the world, most notably the USA, there are chapters of Prime
Timers and the Pride
Senior Network that exists “To encourage and promote services which foster
maximum health, well being, and quality of life for the aging lesbian, gay, bisexual
& transgender community through advocacy and education and research.” The
Palms Manasota claims
to be America's first Gay & Lesbian Adult Living Community. It was inspired by
Bill Laing, the man with the vision who wanted to enjoy retirement in a community
that was safe for Gay & Lesbian Seniors. Anyone
with views on housing projects for senior LGBT people is invited to share them.
Please drop an email to LGBmind-matters Top
| Online
Resources Age
Concern Age Concern
is the first charity for the elderly to hosted a national conference to raise
awareness about the specific needs of older
lesbians and gay men and to call for an end to discrimination. SAGE
or Senior Action in a Gay Environment, was founded in 1977 and is the USA's oldest
and largest social service and advocacy organization dedicated to LGBT (lesbian,
gay,bisexual, transgender) senior citizens.
Institute
for Gay and Lesbian Strategic Studies (IGLSS) Useful American based site on
all aspects of gay rights issues. Caffmos
UK based contact site for older gay with International links and useful information.
In addition to its monthly bulletin to members, it holds regularly social events
in England and Scotland. The
Palms of Manasota This ambitious development , was the dream of Bill Laing,
a gay retired college professor who used mostly his own money to start a community
where gay older people could live openly without fear. Primetimers
A World wide network orginating in Boston USA whose purpose is to provide mature
gay and bisexual men, and their admirers, with opportunities to come together
in a supportive atmosphere to enjoy social, educational, and recreational activities.
Polari
Is a London based organisation that works for better services for older lesbians,
gays and bisexuals. Although they don't give advice themselves, they help you
find the service or advice you need The
Alzheimer's Society's Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual and Transgender (LGBT) Carers group
is a telephone support service for anyone who is lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender
and who is, or who has been, caring for someone with dementia KC
CSIP The Knowledge Community at CSIP hosts a comprehensive list of web and
other resources for older LGBT people | |
