About the Author

A précis of my miserable existence.

Stuff I have done

I write stuff. See me write stuff here.

The missus, who slaps paint on stuff

The missus is very talented, though don't tell her I said so. I'll never hear the end of it.

Hitting folks with stuff

In my spare time, I teach people to hit other people with parts of their own body and bits of wood. It's a hobby.

FAQ (pronounced Fah Queue)

Frequently Asked Questions. Why Does It Hurt So Much, Daddy? Why did so many puppies have to die?

Things I find amusing

The pain of others. The pointlessness of existence. The fact that I actually paid to sit through The Unbearable Lightness of Being. Well. Halfway through it.

Contact me

You may contact me, insult me, or threaten me with legal action. The best insults and/or threats of litigation may be published! There may even be a small prize!