PERFECT Pitch, written by John Godber, was performed in The Devonshire Studio, Chatsworth Centre, by Riverside Drama Company. 

This company excels in this type of comedy, and it was hilarious from start to finish!

"Just move it to the left a bit orders Yvonne, to her husband Ron, who is struggling to move their caravan, which Yvonne insists is parked a little bit 'off centre'. Liz Turner, as Yvonne gave a stunning performance. Martin Holtom, as Ron, was superb, as always! 

Ron, a head teacher, was forced into early retirement, and decided to use his settlement to buy this top of the range caravan, which as he discovered, was a weighty object to move single handed! Well, it was £14,000!! 

They didn't really want to come to this site, but it was all that could be found at short notice, and it did overlook the sea, but then again, was on the cliff edge! 

Having 'sorted' the 'van, Ron tries to put up the awning, but having mislaid the instructions, got rather tangled up, so he shoved it under the 'van in disgust.

Peace at last. But they hadn't reckoned on another 'van coming and parking so close, and complete with perfectly erected awning! This, belonged to Steph and Grant. 

Steph wanders out of the 'van, and starts chatting to Yvonne. A wonderful performance by Emjay Sadler, who had got this character off to perfection, with her broad "Oooh yeah right" sort of accent. Steph is a very tall girl, but Grant, her husband, somewhat smaller, but very much 'in charge' and of course, is a bit of a know-all! An excellent performance by John Lomas. 

Early evening, Yvonne and Ron sit outside having a quiet drink, when a moaning and groaning, with squeals of pleasure, come from the other 'van, which is rocking frantically!! Shocked, disgusted, and somewhat envious, were the reactions from Ron and Yvonne. 

All goes quiet at last. Steph appears, all pleased with herself, and joins them, then out swaggers Grant looking smug! The girls get chatting, Steph says, "Lets you an' me go out an' gerra pizza or summat, yeah? Yvonne agrees. They decide, with or without their husbands blessing, to go to a strip show!!! A real, full monty! Off they go, dressed to kill. 

Later, as Ron undresses for bed, we hear the noise and music from the show (he, of course doesn't) it coincides perfectly with his undressing ... he slowly takes off his trousers, and shirt, even more slowly dons on a red plaid nightshirt! This brings the house down. Brilliantly done! 

The girls arrive back rather worse for wear, obviously having had a whale of a time, Yvonne had been on stage with all these male strippers!! Naughteee! 

Next day finds her suffering a dreadful hangover. The couples are sitting outside, when Grant suddenly declares "Ant she gorra gob on 'er," referring to Yvonne, not being insulting, but suggesting that with that mouth, she must he able to sing! 

There's a talent show in town, the girls enter, in spite of Yvonne's objections. She, much to Steph's amazement wins, with her impersonation of Dusty Springfield! Steph comes second with 'Cher'. 

All find themselves enjoying the holiday, but when packing the 'van for home, Ron finds the instructions for the awning... 

A great play, and a really good evening's entertainment. 

The director was Liz Turner, helped along by the cast. 

By June Barker.