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I Take Rugs
Well, let me tell you 'bout my latest hobby
If you will promise not to tell a bobby
It's guaranteed to titillate and excite
Take one or two and you'll be dancing all night
So many different types of them you can try
Afghan, Moroccan, Lebanese, Dutch and Thai
They could be brown or black or purple or pink
They're so much better than kissing and drink
Let's all take rugs
Although they're made by thugs
They might be covered in bugs
But open up your lugs
I take a load of rugs
He's a good
He's a good
He's a good
He's a good
He's a good
He's a good
He's a good boy really
He just takes rugs, that's all
I just can't get enough of the swirling coloured patterns
Rugs make me feel confident and cocky and big
The trouble with it is that once you've started
Giving it up will make you broken-hearted
I got addicted and I told a doctor
The very mention of it totally shocked her
She said I ought to make a full confession
And in response I did a pig impression
She called the coppers as I started to snort
I was arrested and they took me to court
I say take rugs
Everybody take rugs
There's nothing wrong with rugs
Everybody take rugs
Take rugs! Take rugs!
Well, the judge banged his hammer and they threw me in the slammer
And they wouldn't even offer me bail
I got a ten year sentence but I'm showing no repentance
Rugs are easier to come by in jail
De-De-dit- De-dee
Dit-dit-dit-de-dee
Dit-dit-de-dit-dit
De-de-dee
RUGS
Words by Waen Shepherd 2004
Copyright Control
Written for BBC Radio 2's The Day the Music Died
Original transmission 31.07.04
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