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Cat in a Washing Machine
I put a cat in the washing machine and watched it
And watched it spinning around and around and uh
I saw its little face drowning in the suds and uh
Its little paws trying to claw their way out
Ooh, and it made me feel kinda funny and
Uh dontcha know it made me feel alright
Like a mighty wind all rushing up inside of me
And gushing out through my mouth like sound
(whispered): Whoosh
I put a bat in the washing machine, it took me
Simply hours and hours to catch it
It's been so very frightened of me ever since I
I pulled its wings off and pumped on its head
Ooh, Daddy, can you see me in my parachute?
No, you can't because I am invisible
I'm gonna drop behind enemy lines
With a target on my breast and a sign saying "Enemy"
BOY: Mummy, Mummy. Look at the moon. It looks like an angry horse.
MOTHER: What? No, it doesn't.
BOY: Yes. Yes, it does, in my eyes.
I put a lizard in the washing machine and found it
So tediously unsatisfying, so I
I lifted up the hem of my skirt and there was
A load of squirrels and geese inside it
Ooh, Elvis, can you see me now
Dancing in the ditch like an Aztec adventurer
I'm gonna change my name to Pariah Carey
And throw a queenie when I can't get my Special Brew
Ooh, can you see me, Lonnie Donegan
Standing with a shovel in the ocean waves
In my Peter Pan wig and my royal regalia
I look a little like the Jack of Spades
BOY: Mummy. The moon.
MOTHER: How many times? It's not a horse.
BOY: But it is, Mummy. It's a horse. A horse. A horse. A horse.
MOTHER: Stop it.
BOY: A horse. A horse. A horse. A horse.
The moon is gonna getcha!
Ah-ooh-ah! Ah-ooh-ah!
The moon is gonna getcha!
Neigh!
The moon is gonna getcha!
Ah-ooh-ah! Ah-ooh-ah!
The moon is gonna getcha!
Neigh!
Can you see me standing in the fireplace
Like Joan of Arc in the middle of the darkness
Later on, I'll be standing on the roof
In the wind pretending I'm a TV aerial
And it looks so cool
And it feels just great
I'm writhing around on the lino
And it feels so very good
Words by Waen Shepherd 2005
Copyright Control
Written during the sessions for "Beef Scarecrow"
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