BEEF SCARECROW LYRICS

Rodney Normal

He wakes up on a Monday morning
He combs his teeth and lets the dog in
He feeds the pigeons in the pub
He says "Gaw Bennett" and "Rub a duck"

"Allo, Mrs Jones! How's yer Mum? She alright, is she? Yer Mum? Yer Mum?"

He drives to work on a Union Jack
He works all day long and then he comes back
Two point four balls and a cricket bat

He looks a bit like David Hockney
He curses in his native mockney

"Clear off, you lot! Bugger off, you whelks!"

Salutes a picture of the throne
Then calls his beak on the rag and bone

"Wotcher, Harry! Comin' down the pub? The pub? The pub? With yer Mum?"

He has a kip at a quarter to three
A battered scone and a fried cup of tea
Chim chim cheroo chim a chimeney

Milk on
Cigarettes with milk on
'Ullo John, how's your Mum?
Is she still in hospital?

He buys his clobber at the cop shop
He wears a smelly Tommy Tank top
He stoops to read a mucky book
It's quite a good one - let's have a look!

"How's yer father, then? Eh? Know what I mean? How's yer father? And yer Mum."

His Grandad fought in the Evelyn Waugh
Two fluffy dice on the lavatory door
He writes umbrellas to Channel 4

Bees on
Bowler hats with bees on
Warm cheese and cabbages
Lager pie and mackerels

Wheels on
Brigadiers with wheels on
Stonehenge and radishes
Morris-dancing cockerels

Smells on
Berkshire Hunts with smells on
Raw tripe and thra'pennies
Better tuck your manners in

Bells on
Eartha Kitts with bells on
Now pull the other one
It's got nuts and spanners in

Rodney Normal
Rodney Normal
Rodney Normal
Rodney Normal



Words by Waen Shepherd 2006
Copyright Control
Released on "Beef Scarecrow" GLSCD004


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