HOW TO DEAL WITH UNSOLICITED PHONE CALLS WHICH ATTEMPT TO SELL YOU PRODUCTS, OFFER YOU SERVICES YOU DON'T WANT AND CONSUMER RESEARCH

Step 1: Answer the phone when it rings. A common mistake made by those blessed with precognition is knowing that the call is going to waste their time so they don't answer. This will only lead to you building a massive Karmic imbalance as you avoid your Karmic Event Sequencers Program. Resulting in a critical Mass of negative events that could end in you spontaneously combusting.

Step 2: Listen politely until they start asking you questions.

Step 3: Ask them to hold Whilst you deal with some unspecified matter. Then play the tape you made earlier.

Step 4: Before you answer any call you should make an audio tape of a very disturbing incident. This can be anything from your house being on fire to being sexually assaulted.

Step 5: If the caller is still on the phone after playing the tape ask them to wait a little longer. Play the other tape you made earlier.

Step 6: After making the first tape make another recording of an even more distressing event.

Step 7: If the caller is still waiting on the phone after this ask for their phone number and promise to ring them back. If they refuse and want to continue the call agree then answer their first question. After doing this again ask them to wait as you must attend to something urgently. Then leave your home immediately as they are obviously secret agents who will be coming to 'see ' you very soon.

Step 8: Take the phone number that you where given by the caller and enter it into all the Junk mail and mailing lists you can find with the callers details you have. ( IF these people insist on talking to people then they ought to be happy talking to each other.)