B r i g h t o n

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B o l l o c k s


We're Friendly

There are over 250,000 people in Brighton, Hove and Portslade, but you still bump into about ten people you know just going out to get a pint of milk.

You Can Buy Tons and Tons of Stuff Here

Brighton is fantastic for shops. Even if you're skint you can always find some inexpensive, groovy little knick-knack you just couldn't live without. If you're rich, you can just spend spend spend...

We're "Relaxed"

The town is cool. Brighton people love relaxing, and there are so many ways to do it... Traditional types can stick to shagging, drugs and being a slack f**ker who just doesn't give a toss!

We're Cultured

There's loads of culture here. There are 23 cinema screens in the town. Brighton also puts on the biggest British arts festival outside Edinburgh every May.

You can get Free Drugs here

Free Drugs is, of course, "a very rude and filthy magazine concocted by Brighton and Exeter-based cartoonists, very much in the spirit of Robert Crumb."

We're Gorgeous

Brighton has more sexually attractive people of all imaginable types and permutations per square foot than any other place on Earth. And that's without even considering the UK and overseas visitors who flock here....

We're Clever

A Further Education college, two universities and more workshops and courses than you can shake a stick at.

Lots of Famous People Live Here

And not in a diamond-encrusted famous person's ghetto like they do in London. They mingle with the likes of us. They have to.

We're Creative

Everyone's up to something here. Everyone's got some sort of project on the go. Kinda active slacking.

We Like a Laugh

..and the sunshine which we get in bucketloads being south of the stretch of hills called the Downs measn there's always a cheesy smile on our reddened glowing faces.