AFC CASTROL
2005 2006 JUNIOR DIV 2 WINNERS & COUNTY FA JUNIOR CUP RUNNERS UP
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2005 2006 JUNIOR DIV 2 WINNERS & COUNTY FA JUNIOR CUP RUNNERS UP |
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___________________________________________________________________________ AFC CASTROL Since Chiseldon Castrol FC no longer play in Chiseldon and moved to Wanborough we are now named AFC CASTROL as we will still receive sponsorship money from Castrol
The time has come to dust off the boots and get going
on our new season. ___________________________________________________________________________ NEWSFLASH.....CASTROL HOMELESS ? Chiseldon Castrol FC have been given their marching orders by Chiseldon Council. After clinching the division 2 title, it seems the council members have decided to let Chiseldon Castrol FC move on. Chiseldon Castrol are now looking for an alternative venue and all serious offers or proposals should directed to the team secretary Ian Titcombe at Ian.Titcombe@tycoelectronics.com READ ALL ABOUT IT
READ ALL ABOUT IT ___________________________________________________________________________
Dear All, ___________________________________________________________________________ All - The First Team Diary for the coming week is as follows. Training at 1830hrs at Chiseldon on Thursday Night. (26th). Home to Shrewton Res on Saturday (28th). Meeting Time is 1400hrs. Let me know your availability if you did not confirm after last nights match. I understand all 13 from last night were available. Away to Calne Town Res on Wednesday 1st September. Kick off currently 1815hrs. (We are seeking a Later kick off under floodlights). Please advise if you will struggle to meet the current kick off time. Squad Strength I believe the squad is as numerically strong as last year but could be susceptible to an injury crisis at any time. Whilst 3 of the O'Connells have gone, they have been replaced by the arrival of Rory, Seth, Jimmy Igoe and full season availability of the likes of Craig, Alex and Hank, who either joined late last year or were out injured for a while. Birchy was also injured a lot and sick note Wayne Clarke might be returning imminently. Donners is also a returning player. We have some other potential signings in the offing with the hopeful return of Chris Kyle and a couple of others. I don't always have the time to talk to people before or straight after the game to explain some selection decisions but I am hopeful that I will have those decisions to make most weeks so I will make an effort to explain things as best I can. Some times it will be a tactical decision but I will need to give those that aren't in the starting 11 an opportunity to fight their way back in. Those opportunities will arise through player absence from training or matches. Home Match Day Requirements Our responsibilities on Match Days at home have risen this season. In addition to putting up the nets and marking the pitch. We are now responsible for leaving the changing rooms in a clean condition. With this in mind, I intend to rotate certain duties amongst people so that Ticky and I are not left doing it every week. We are a team so these duties shall be shared amongst the team. I do not like to see people hanging back to avoid helping with the nets prior to a game or leaving the pitch straight away after a game. That said, I am prepared to
fulfil all post match duties should we secure 3 points in the match. What an
incentive! Another reminder that the fee for a booking this year is £10. This is an £8 booking charge and a £2 club charge. This charge goes towards paying fines metered out when the club amasses a certain number of bookings. I believe 19 is the first level then 33. There is a Race Night on the last Saturday in September which I hope you can all be available for. Tickets will be available soon. We hope the money can pay for new kit and ground improvements plus go towards indoor training costs through the winter. Gully, Austy, ___________________________________________________________________________ Melksham Town v Chiseldon Castrol
Squad: Hammond, Parry, Trevest, Kemmett, Hancock,
Donnelly, Aust, Camden, Andrews, Burchill, Palmer Subs Michaelis, Ingram,
Mitchell Home to Cricklade
Cricklade Town will no doubt be difficult opposition.
We played them twice at the end of last season and came out with 2 1-1 draws. At
their place we were robbed and complaints and a lack of discipline led to us
finishing with 9 men. At Home just a week later we drew 1-1 after Message from Jim to the Playing Squad
Preseason continues - FIRST AGAINST RESERVES Underneath the hazy midsummer sun of Chiseldon, two almighty teams clashed for their preseason tour of Wiltshire. This eagerly awaited fixture was a sell out after a busy Chiseldon Castrol marketing department burned the midnight oil in order to cope with the demand of its fellow supporters. The two managers had their work cut out to pick the starting elevens from a fully fit squad (excluding Gary Donnelly who recently injured himself in a gardening accident). Their decision were put to the test for the first 45 minutes when both teams locked horns in a battle most would consider similar to two stags defending territory, Nick Camden was the most determined to show his aggressiveness and upon hearing the cry of war threw himself at Colin Thompson. Like young fighters who had prepared for battle but never participated, haymakers flew causing tornadoes in coate water. This clash of gladiators soon ended when Nick Camden realised his team mates were not coming to his aid and that Colin Thompson has only recently been allowed out after 8 oclock. The crowd at this point was awoken from their slumber and started to look to both team to score. 45 minutes played, the game scoreless HALF TIME Chiseldon Castrol First Team 0 - 0 Chiseldon Castrol Reserve Team With changes for both teams and team talks of the highest proportion, the teams ran onto the pitch like wild horses, excited to be free to express their football abilities and of course that they were in deed on Chiseldon hallowed turf ! In the 78th minute, the ball lofted in the danger area was bundled in by an embarrassed Guy Andrews who in his fortune could not believe what he had done. The fans went wild and the roar could be heard in nearby Berkshire. Chiseldon Castrol First Team 1 - 0 Chiseldon Castrol Reserve Team With all to play for and pride the top agenda, the reserve team looked to settle an old score and within 1 minutes of conceding the reserve team striker Craig (surname escapes me) burst through a mature defence to position himself one on one with the goalkeeper (his brother, Lee). This battle of minds and brotherly pride was going to be settled in the old fashioned method. Craig shimmied one way, sending the older of the two the wrong way but in a cunning ploy and maturity shinning through, Lee put out a leg in a vain attempt of stopping the player. Fortunately for Craig his work here was done and whilst his body was sent crashing towards the green green grass of Chiseldon, the fans again roared like african lions after a kill. Chiseldon Castrol First Team 1 - 1 Chiseldon Castrol Reserve Team With the score settled, both teams looked for the winner as draw would be boring and as excitement is Chiseldon Castrol's middle name, the game continued at full pace. It was the first team who's maturity and experience gathered momentum and placed them on top of the energy list. These young gazelles leaping for every ball and challenged for every ball like ice hockey players put two passes together before the ball was in front of the oppositions goal. It was a change of tactics that would seal the other teams fate and Ian McCarthy put the first team ahead again. Chiseldon Castrol First Team 2 - 1 Chiseldon Castrol Reserve Team From this point forward it would be football of the highest quality that would add to either tally and at this point in the game, quality was far from either teams minds. Team listing and manager comments to follow - watch this space. ___________________________________________________________________________ AWARDS NIGHT SPECTACULAR All eyes were focused on the trophies at the end of the 2003 \ 2004 season for both teams. The awards up for grabs was players player and managers player and with many contenders for the award, it was anyones guess who would leave with it at the end of the evening. Congratulations to Gareth Parry for picking up the players player award
Congratulations to Nick Kemmett \ Paul Churchward for sharing the managers player award As with true tradition, all players attended to show their appreciation of a good night and free food.
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It was with great sadness that Chiseldon Castrol said goodbye to a dear friend and reserve manager Phil "the undertaker" Tweed. Phil who has been with Chiseldon Castrol since the beginning of time and when the club was called "Burmah Bell Ends" of course sponsored by Bells exhausts of old town (only joking) Phil tremendous courage to tackle this challenge earner him the reputation of Wiltshire Junior Division Two crazy manager of the month award for 4 month running from October until January when Chiseldon's old boys started to take in younger, eager, faster and killer passing lads who's ambition in life was to win without taking prisoners ! Phils impressive career spanned 26 games in total and the league recognised this loyalty by offering Phil the golden throat lozenger, an award for vocal managers Phil Tweed's Managerial Profile Managerial Start July 2003 WINS 5 DRAWS 4 LOSES 17 GOALS SCORED 32 GOALS CONCEDED 80 I am sure you will all join me in wishing the undertaker an easy retirement. Below are some messages from the sidelines at Chiseldon Castrols ground. "oi baldy, what was that ?" "Phil is mean, especially when it comes to " For all you devoted fans, below is a copy of Phils leaving speech. It should be an inspiration to us all.
Ladies, Gentlemen, Team-Mates, Honourable Secretary…. It started badly, and got worse…. Not this speech, the SEASON! All in all it was a strangely enjoyable season, in a perverted, tortuous and despairing kind of way. However, to finish just outside of the European Qualifying places was truly exceptional, particularly given our position in late October. Whist this was a commendable achievement, more note worthy are the number of new young players that have been drawn inevitably to the glamour, history and legendary status of our great Club. I should remind those of you new to the club that Chiseldon Castrol has over 35 long years of history, with a wealth of talent at our disposal. Unfortunately, along-with last year’s out-going Reserve Team manager, most of this talent-pool failed to turn up for our opening matches. So my thanks to Adrian Brabazon for passing on such a well drilled, capable & gifted squad of non-playing players. By Mid-September things were very, very bleak. Horse had problems of his own, and in addition the First Team were struggling for players, which meant the promotion of Aust on a permanent basis. Fortunately two individuals were brave enough to step into the vacuum… Lee McGoran & Corey Higham. And what is more they brought with them new talent, which meant that as a team and as a Club, we could survive. Corey & Lee, my thanks to you for playing, and for the players you found for the Club. Paul Hughes & Warren Anger got to Chiseldon via Corey, and proved not only to be excellent, consistent, players…. But they were also highly skilled in the art of brining along mates to cover for last minute shortages. I hope that you both stay on next year, and that you have a couple more players willing to enjoy the wide open spaces of the Chiseldon Theatre of Screams…. I also hope you will both stay, because you can both DRIVE, AND you have your own TRANSPORT! Talk of our great stadium reminds me, I should also thank the Chiseldon Parish Council for preparing pitches with more divots, undulations, and dog-turds; and with grass longer than a chinaman’s paddy field, as to make Football a secondary consideration on most occasions….. They produced a remarkably consistent record of utterly shite pitches.
Talking of which, Lee
McGoran brought with him Gary Loveday & Tim Lenderyou, and the 3 of them had an
immediate impact in our momentous win against Trax. Many have called it a 2-1
thrashing of the then league leaders, but the truth is that, in the best Castrol
traditions, we got our noses in front and defended like the Alamo for the final
25 minutes. None-the-less, a great win and one of Tim’s last appearances for
us…. Whilst it remains Gary Loveday’s only appearance This match was also significant for another reason….. Dave “break yer legs” Rendel. It was here he was unveiled as a Castrol player for the first time, and although he didn’t score, he showed many of the experienced old guard (Me & Gully) that he would be a great long term prospect. What poor judges of ability Gully and I are! Horse, if you are listening… Dave muffed his way through the season, spurning chance after chance, created for him by the supremely gifted Matt McCrory. He should have bagged a hat-trick in each game, as Matty laid on sitter after sitter… but no. He finally fluked 4 goals during our final game against Tidworth, but even then he still failed to impress. So, David will need at least another year with the Stiffs to hone his finishing skills. As will David’s two young associates, Steve Titley & Lee Wilden, they too failed to impress for much of the latter half of this season, which is in fact the only half of the season in which they played. I was just grateful I didn’t have to travel to Cavvy Square for the first 3 months of the season to pick this lot up. They all have much to learn, and I expect them to learn it in the pressure cooker of Reserve Team football, next year. Matt McCrory, as I have already mentioned, was a worthy addition, he came with Shamus Keown, via Dave Carey. Both Matt and Shamus showed more loyalty than Dave, which was particularly disappointing since Dave’s Mum would normally wash the kit! Both Matt & Shamus were there for our thread-bear, 11 man win against Blyskewijka (The Poles), and both played in matches when they could easily have cried off. For sticking with the Team, I thank you… Now there remain two other players worthy of note. They were both fundamental to the continuation of the team in the rocky days of October/November. Brian Gulliver and Pete Thompson both had good seasons, and both were unfortunate to be playing in a team so short on confidence, consistency and ability (and while we are at it, very short on leadership). Both Gully & Thomo continued to enjoy their Saturday afternoons, whatever the result, and it was their reactions upon which I could muster the enthusiasm to go through it all again the next week. In closing I, The Undertaker, wish to make only 2 points (via our new manager), Firstly, is that without Mr Ian Titcombe as our Secretary, Castrol’s Football Club would cease to exist. I don’t know where Ticker finds the time, but to sign-on over 80 players last year, with over 30 of them living at his address, is a feat in itself. How the league never rumbled us is still a mystery. Ian, I would like to thank you on behalf of all the reserves for…. Ø Signing us all on Ø Phoning-in the results each week Ø Sending-in the Team details each week Ø Marking-out the pitches out when there was no groundsman left Ø For organising this venue tonight Ø For handling the fines with the FA Ø And for even suggesting that you come out of retirement to help the Reserves. Thank you Ticker, and I hope you will continue for a many more years. (A Club Toast Please)…
My second point, in closing, is that you need to get your cocks out! We must improve our “cocks-out-to-player” ratio next year, or we will not make any progress; on, or off, the field. It’s not good enough, and I will not support a ground change until I know that we will, as a team, make full use of the potential new shower facilities….. A club with such a proud history cannot allow it’s new generation of stars to be shamed by such disgraceful behaviour… You all need to take a long hard look at yourselves…. and ask yourselves this; Next year, who will have the biggest? --------------------------------------------- Thank you all for your support this year, I have really enjoyed writing this speech, much more so than you’ve enjoyed listening to it. Have a good night, and I have to say Bill Bailey LIVE at the Oxford Apollo, is much funnier than me! Yours, Until My Knees Cannot Give Anymore…. The Undertaker
[Serious, Reverential Tones…]
Players Player : David, Peregrine, Rendel (Ian Watter’s is the Reserve Team manager now famous for putting an England U-15 International On-The-Bench!)…. : ………….Young Player of the Year Award : Steve Titley
The Armatige Shanks “Piss-Poor-Pass” of the Season:
Paul Aust
The Church of England Martyrs Award
(awarded for the player who played-on despite a number of weekly, crippling,
injuries): Paul Hughes
Worst Performance at Left Back
: Pete Thomson, last 15 mins v’s New College (they scored 4 when he came on
pitch). Most Dangerous Free Kick : Warren Anger (verses Tidworth [home], nearly took Gully’s head off). The “Imperial Leather” Award for Post Match Cleanliness: Awarded jointly to Dave Rendel, Steve Titley, Lee Wilden, Paul Hughes, Warren Anger, Tom Bailey and Colin Thompson for consistently not showering after matches. The Winston Churchill Award for Motivational Leadership in “Rallying of the Troops” : The Manager, for his call after 35mins against New College at 0-0: “Come Lads, This Lot are RUBBISH”… End result : Chiseldon Castrol 0 – New College 7 (seven) The NHS award for New Business: The Manager, for recalling Andy Lydiard when not fully fit and shagging out his other good knee (sorry Lyd’s). The Sam Alerdyce Award for procurement of quality players to keep the club alive: This Year a joint Award made to Lee McGoran and Corey Higham (and a Club Toast, please).
The Gerrard Houlier Award for procurement of underperforming wastrels
: The Charles Darwin “Survival of the Fittest” Award, for premature self-nomination for substitution……: David Pridday, for asking to be substituted after only 40 mins against the Pole’s because “he was knackered”.. The Jesus of Nazereth “Miraculous Recovery” Award: Paul Hughes for feigning a mystery leg strain 5 mins prior to kick-off against Trax, then punting a ball from the sidelines 70 yrds cross-field with the same injured leg ! The Poisoned Challis Award for Next Season: Paul Aust ___________________________________________________________________________ CHISELDON CASTROL ANNUAL AWARDS NIGHT Cricket Club Friday 4th June 7pm ___________________________________________________________________________
Thought I would drop you a line to say thanks for your efforts this season. After the Wroughton results were removed our record read as 32 played with 6 wins and 6 draws and 20 defeats. We conceded 70 goals (18 in two games!!) but only scored 34 goals. Whilst it was an improvement on our first year, I think we failed to achieve what we were capable of and a lot of that was due to consistency in performance and consistency in availability. If you look at the table and where some teams finished then I'm sure you will draw your own conclusions. I look at Shrewton, who finished 6th, and see that they only scored 47 goals but they only conceded 47 goals as well. (Take off the two drubbings and we only conceded 52!!). Pre-Season / New Players/Availability I want us to do a lot better next season so I am planning to start training on Tuesdays and Thursdays beginning the 8th June. New players are welcome but given that consistency will be key I am looking for people willing to committ to high availability for a 34 game season. The beginning and end of seasons are fixture heavy and player availability is key. We probably play a 3rd of the fixtures in Aug, Apr and May which is traditionally when people are on holiday or start thinking the season is over even when games are left to play. Friendlies One friendly has already been arranged for Wednesday 28th July against Bromham, who have won Junior Div One this year and are getting Senior Status next season. I am looking to play 5 first team friendlies if possible so if anyone knows of teams looking for friendlies let me know. Reserves We intend to run two sides next season and are currently looking for a Reserve Team Manager to galvanise the youngsters in the reserves and lead them to better things. I believe they are good enough for a top four finish/title push in their division but again, availability and consistency are important. If you know anyone who might be interested in managing the reserve side then let me know. Tweedy did a good job this year despite very trying circumstances and gave me his better players on a number of occassions, with Tim Lenderyou, Peter Thompson and Dave Rendle all doing well at times. End of Season In order to close of this season and look ahead to next season at the same time, I'm planning a Short Presentation evening and AGM/Ideas Meeting on Friday 4th June at the Swindon Cricket Club. This is in addition to plans to go to Bath on May 30th. This will allow both First Team Players and Reserves to get a little recognition for their efforts this year and for people to put forward suggestions for improvements, fundraising and training. Players' Player of the Year Award I would like peoples 1,2,3 for player of the year award by the end of may please. This will be awarded on the 4th June along with the Managers Player of the Year Award plus some other bits of fun recognition. Look forward to hearing from you all. ___________________________________________________________________________ Chiseldon Castrol Manager in Signing Hatrick
It was revealed today that Chiseldon Castrol manager Horse has been quick to start negotiations with three new players to prepare for next season. The players have been tracked closely by the scouting team of CCFC and in an interview, Mr Horse made the following comment, "These new players will make an immediate impact. I have placed them with one of CCFC's most senior players Trigger so they can settle into life in Chiseldon as quick as possible". CCFC's new signings with Trigger
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Chiseldon Castrol Reserve Player Manager in Resignation Shock
It has today been announced by the board of directors at Chiseldon Castrol Football Club that they have unwillingly accepted the resignation from reserve team manager Phil Tweed. Today's news has sent shockwaves through the club and now Chiseldon Castrol director of football Ian Titcombe is looking for another mug.....I mean reserve football team manager to nurture the quality in the reserve side. Phil said his decision was the hardest he had to make in recent months but he wanted to leave football to concentrate on getting ready for the forthcoming Frankie Tour of Edinburgh by eating pasties and drinking guiness. Phil's previous hard decision was whether to call heads or tails at the football games Phil Tweed's Managerial Profile Managerial Start July 2003 WINS 5 DRAWS 4 LOSES 17 GOALS SCORED 32 GOALS CONCEDED 80 I am sure you will all join me in wishing the undertaker an easy retirement. Below are some messages from the sidelines at Chilseldon Castrols ground. "That center back can run backwards quickly cant he" "Old Phil is a gentleman, especially in the bedroom" |
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SITE UPDATED - 30/10/2006 |
OUT WITH THE OLD AND IN WITH THE
NOT SO OLD 
