When Belgium Put the Kybosh on the Kaiser

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A silly German sausage thought Napoleon he'd be,
Then went and broke his promise - it was made in Germany
He shook hands with Britania and eternal peace he swore
Naughty boy! he talked of peace whilst he prepared for war.
He stirred up little Serbia to serve his dirty trick
But dirty nights at Liege quite upset this dirty Dick
His luggage labelled "England" and his programme nicely set
He shouted "First stop, Paris!" but he hasn't got there yet
For...

   

 
Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
On his throne it hurts to sit
And when John Bull starts to hit
He will never sit upon it any more!!

Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
He'll be banished to the woods
And we'll bar his German goods
And we'll never drink his lager any more!!
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His warships sailed upon the sea, they looked a pretty sight
But when they heard a bulldog bark they disappeared from sight
The Kaiser said "Be careful - if by Jellicoe they're seen
Every man'o'war I've got will be a submarine!"
We chased his ships to Turkey, and the Kaiser startled stood
Scratched his head and said "Don't hurt - you see I'm touching wood!"
Then Turkey bought the warships just to aid the German plot
Be careful, Mister Turkey, or you'll do the Turkey Trot!
For...

   

Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
When we enter Germany
"F**k the Kaiser!!" it will be
Oh, it won't be "Hoch!, the Kaiser!" any more!! 

Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
And if Turkey makes a stand
She'll get Ghurka'ed and Japanned
And her views, she'll never air 'em any more!!

 
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He'll have to go to school again and learn his geography
He quite forgot Australia and the "Hands across the sea"
India and Canada, the Russian and the Jap, and
England looked so small he couldn't see it on the map.
Whilst Ireland seemed unsettled, "Ah!" said he, "I'll settle John"
But he didn't know the Irish like he knew them later on
Tho'the Kaiser stirred the lion, please excuse him from the crime
His lunatic attendant wasn't with him at the time
When...

 

Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
And in Berlin come some day
Every German band will play
"Rule, Britannia! Rule the waves for ever more!! "

Belgium put the kybosh on the Kaiser
Europe took a stick and made him sore
We shall shout with victries' joy
"Hold your hand out, naughty boy!"
You must never play at soldiers any  more!! "