[Sunday, 01st] Abu Dhabi "Twilight" Grand Prix [13:00, BBC 1] Lewis Hamilton was on pole with Vettel beside him on the front row and the Brawns 4th & 5th. Squeezed by Vettel, Webber knocked bits off Barrichello's front wing, some of which Button collected, but everyone kept going. Button got ahead of Barrichello on lap 2/55 on a high-tech but boring track with nowhere to overtake but the 2 straights.
   Hamilton, the favourite to win, was unable to get away from Vettel, who began to look the more likely winner. Hamilton's brakes failed with 35 laps to go, Button caught up with Webber in the final few laps but the Red Bulls were not to be denied another 1-2 finish.
NFL Sunday [18:04, Sky Sports 2] The Dolphins went to New Jersey, where the Jets were wearing their Steelers retro uniforms. Defences dominated in the 1st quarter. The Jets drove up close at the start of the 2nd but they got just a FG. 0-3. The Jets racked up a pair of sacks, the Fins got one with 4½ minutes left to set up the 10th punt of the half, and they went on to kick an equalizing FG. 3-3 at half-time.
   In the 3rd quarter, the Jets got another sack and Feely kicked a 55 yard FG. 3-6. Then Ginn returned the kick off 100 yards for a TD!! 10-6. Then Taylor scooped up a forced fumble and rumbled 47 yards to the Jets' end zone. 17-6.
   The Jets recovered a fumbled punt catch at the Miami 29 and Sanchez finished the drive with a bootleg out to the left with everyone else piled up in the middle of the field. The Jets lined up for a 2-point try, false started and kicked an extra point. 17-13. So Ginn returned the kick off 101 yards for another TD!! 24-13.
   Cotchery took the next Jets play 53 yards to the Miami 21 and Edwards fought into the Dolphins' end zone on the next play. 24-19 after a 2-point try flopped. A 4th quarter sack for the Jets didn't stop the Dolphins' TD drive but they didn't make a daft 2-point try. 30-19.
   The Jets came back with a TD drive, went for 2, collected an illegal shift penalty and no cigar on the next try. 30-25. Sack #6 for the Jets. They made a 4th & 10 to the Miami 12; 2 sacks for Starks, and the Jets went out on downs at the Miami 16. The end.
Next up, the Vikings & Brett Favre at Lambeau Field [21:16, sky Sports 2] Lots of boos for Favre when he showed himself. The Packers got a FG out of recovering a wild Vikings snap but Harvin returned the kick off to the GB 14. The Packers stopped the Vikings but gave up a daft penalty which handed them a TD. 7-3.
   In the 2nd quarter, Rogers let himself be sacked instead of throwing the ball away; something he does a lot. Favre & the Vikings delivered another TD drive for 14-3 and Rogers was sacked again. Peterson continued to run through Packers' tackles. Another defensive penalty persuaded the Vikings to go for 4th down instead of kicking a FG, and they were stopped cold. A 4th sack on Rodgers and Longwell finished the half with a FG for the Vikings. 17-3.
   There was no pressure on Favre in the 3rd quarter drive which ended with a 51 yard pass to Harvin, who caught the ball among 3 Packers. 24-3. The Pack reached the Vikings' 4, Rodgers was sacked at the 8, his fault again, so a FG, 6-24. A squib kick instead of a boot to Harvin gave the ball to the Packers from a Vikings fumble. Wonder of wonders, the drive went for a TD! 24-13.
   The defence showed up all of a sudden, put pressure on Favre and stopped the Vikings. Rodgers fired a big pass to Jones and the Pack had another TD. 24-20. The Vikings came back with a TD drive in the 4th quarter. 31-20. Rodgers ran 35 yards to the Vikings' 15, Jennings caught a TD pass but a 2-point try failed. 31-26.
   Peterson rushed 44 yards to the GB 15 and a TD pass put the match out of reach at 38-26 with time running out. The Vikings looked the better team most of the time but if the Packers' defense had showed up at the start and harassed Favre, and Rodgers could stop making his rookie mistakes and taking sacks, this year's Packers would be a whole lot better.

[Monday, 02nd] Mythbusters [19:00, Discovery] featured the arrival of Buster for the exploding toilet myth. Will a cigarette dropped into a toilet bowl full of flammable aerosol blow the sitter off the bog? No ignition with hair & bug spray, butane or gasoline. No explosion when a naked flame used. And half a tin of black powder failed to dislodge Buster. Busted.
   Run when it's raining and you won't get as wet as walking? Adam & Jamie built a rain shower system in a retired hanger and got wetter when running. Busted. Can ice be used to make magic bullets? Or meat or gelatine? Not for use with a rifle. Jamie built an umbrella gun and Adam put a BB gun mechanism into an umbrella. Both did better than a rifle at point-blank range but myth still busted.
How do they do it? [20:00, Discovery] The prog covered building military helicopters, like the Merlin built at Yeoville; operating driverless 'ghost' trains for the Singapore Metro, and creating surf at Bournmouth's Boscombe Bay by building a reef.
How It's Made [20:30, Discovery] did replica mediaeval swords, pontoon boats, grandfather clocks and fuses for high-voltage systems.
NUMB3RS [Primacy, 21:00, Channel 5] A taxman from out of state went off a roof; was it suicide or was he pushed? He turned out to be in an on-line alternate reality game with a million dollar prize. The Feds had 5,000 suspects. Amita surprised Charlie, who wanted her to move in with him, by admitting she'd played the game, so she became the FBI's bait.
   Larry, back from his monastery, was appalled by the junk in his office. Charlie suggesting side-tracking Spectre, the killer, after Colby was nearly drowned. Amita killed the Spectre character! But the bad guy phoned her for a meeting, and that led to his undoing.
Burn Notice [Comrades, 22:00, FX] Mike had a tail; Nate, his useless brother, who wanted help. His girlfriend's sister was a prisoner of Russian Mob people smugglers, who had doubled the price for bringing her to the US, and Katya had clobbered Ivan with a crowbar. Mike & Sam grabbed Ivan for interrogation and Mike became his prison buddy with Nate as the guard.
   Mike had to stage a gaolbreak for Ivan and his awful mom told Mike that Nate's screw-ups were all Mike's fault. Ivan was scammed into giving up the location of the smuggled girls. The Mob left town as a precaution after offing Ivan. And Sam had spent $1,350 on hospitality for a chancer to get Carla's business card.

[Tuesday, 03rd] Stargate Universe [Water, 20:00, Sky One] Destiny was suddenly running out of water, so the civilians assumed the military was stashing it. The ship stopped at a planet with a surface temperature of -47 deg.C and Lt. Scott & Col. Young went in search of ice. The ice was contaminated near the gate, so they went miles for clean ice, which meant they could bring only derisory amounts back.
   A soldier was eaten by a swarm of alien bugs and Scott fell down a crevasse. The swarm was trapped but began to leak out through a door. But Lt. Johanson trapped it in a barrel of water and dumped it on the planet. Col. Young refused to leave Scott and he was saved. But the soldier died.
CSI:Miami [Target Specific, 21:00, Channel 5] A stabbed woman shot her attacker, dialled 911 and croaked. The Cheesies went after the guy who sacked her for stealing his stuff; like the knife she was killed with. Then they gradually connected a photographer to a series of burglaries involving a personal trainer and a guy with a designer bulletproof coat.
   Ivan, the Russian mobster, was behind it all, so Horatio visited him in gaol to exchange threats. Ivan's guys felt confident enough to jump Calleigh at the crime scene. None of his men would talk, and when he was caught, the Russian burglar was taken out. At the end, Wolfe was ambushed and grabbed for interrogation.
Chuck Vs The Ring [22:00, Virgin One+1] Chuck quit his job at the Buy More and the CIA paid him off. Sarah was teamed with Bryce, who got Chuck involved in all the Intersect stuff, and he will be the new Intersect. Ted Roark and Fulcrum agents crashed the wedding, Morgan had to stall the party in the church, Fulcrum shot up the reception and Casey took out the remains when he and his team parachuted in.
   Chuck used his CIA pay-off to arrange the wedding on the beach that Ellie really wanted and Roark was shot in his cell on Casey's watch. The killer then lifted Bryce. Chuck's dad flashed on the killer; he was a CIA agent who was supposed to be dead. Chuck & Sarah dashed off to save Bryce and stop Fulcrum from getting the Intersect.
   Bryce was shot. He told Chuck to destroy the Intersect just before he croaked. But Chuck reloaded himself before destructing the Intersect cube. And when Fulcrum arrived in force, he became Super Chuck and took the bad guys out with kung fu.

[Wednesday, 03th] Horizon: Earthquake Storm (2003) [19:00, Eden] The advantage of watching old shock-horror editions in digital TV heaven is that you get to find out how accurate the predictions were. The theory was that one earthquake can trigger another and generate an earthquake storm over a period of years.
   Earthquake researchers in California were able to calculate a red zone for aftershocks, and there was a big earthquake in their red zone. Scientists in Turkey found that Izmit was in a red zone, and the town was ravaged by an earthquake in 1999. Then they decided that Istanbul was next. Except that nothing has happened. Yet.
Mythbusters [Discovery+1, 20:00] Builder, barrel of bricks & pulley; a disaster in the making? Only if the barrel is modified to fail. So myth busted. Will peeing onto the 3rd rail deliver a fatal electric shock? Only if it's done from a range of about 6" so that the stream of pee doesn't break up into drops. Busted. Will putting a penny on the rails derail a train? No chance! Do eelskin wallets wipe magnetic credit cards? Not even direct exposure to an electric eel does it. Myth busted.
NCIS:LA [Killshot, 21:00, Sky One] A North Korean defector croaked on a beach, shot by an expert sniper. It was the Koreans trying to stop him giving away some technology. The shooter was a woman and she was after Danny Soo's contact, too. The boss of the L.A. office is a tiny lady who looks about 200 years old! Soo's girlfriend was also done in, but the killer said that wasn't her.
   Jimmy, Danny's brother, knew more than he was letting on. The killer turned up at a trap for Jimmy. Abby cracked the girlfriend murder and finger's Jimmy's wife. And the killer was shot, bled a lot but escaped to come back in another episode.
NCIS:LA [Keepin' It Real, 21:00, Sky One] A guy went off a building; a corporal back from Iraq with PTSD. His family had clout at the Pentagon and suicide wasn't acceptable. The guy was dead when he went off the roof. He was also buying lots of video games and selling them at half price. He had used good quality counterfeit money on the wrong paper.
   Walter, his sidekick, gave up Rick, the unconvicted forger. The Marines had found the printing plates in Iraq. A Secret Service blonde joined the party and Rick was set up with some good paper. NCIS wouldn't go in until Rick's partner turned up; a sergeant at a transport unit, who was planning to swap $20M in fakes for a consignment of the real thing.

[Thursday, 05th] Without A Trace [Shadows, 20:00, Hallmark] A woman with cancer disappears and the Feds find that she was helping terminal people in pain to die. Her chemo isn't working and Bonnie is fed up with being brave & positive; so has she gone somewhere to commit suicide? One of the Feds has a grumpy dad with incipient Alzheimer's. Bonnie is found eventually but she didn't try to kill herself. The cancer was doing that for her.
Hard To Kill (1990) [21:00, Five US] Undercover cop Mason Storm gets the goods on a guy who's planning to kill a senator and take his job. But corrupt cops take out his family and put Storm in hospital in a coma in 1983. He wakes up 7 years later, the bad guys find out he's a awake but a nurse helps him to get out of the hospital and hide.
   Storm trains himself up again and makes contact again with O'Malley, his pal from IAD, who was frightened out of the force. O'Malley tells Storm that his kid is still alive. Bad guys attack and wreck the house the nurse (and Storm) are sitting.
   Storm recovers his camera with the goods on the head crook. He takes out thousands of dirty cops and causes millions of dollars in damage, O'Malley is shot to bits but the bent replacement senator gets a free trip to gaol and Storm and his son are reunited.
WW$ Raw [23:40, late due to golf] Ozzy & Mrs. Osbourne were the guest hosts. Evan Bourne versus Mizrabul again was another defence of Bourne's talents. Sheamus beat up Jamie Noble in another tasteless display of WW$ sporting values.
   Kofi kicked the Orton gang's collective asses single-handedly so Ozzy added MVP and Mark Henry as back-up. So that was the scumbags sorted out. Raw Has Talent? Santino bit the head off a Batman doll, the Musclepiece twitched his boobs and Chavo & Jillian did a duet and were flattened. So not much talent evident.

[Friday, 06th] RAW remains [18:00, Sky Sports Xtra] Half a dozen Divas had a Battle Royal, and Alicia Fox emerged as the No. 1 Contender. Festoons of flim flam & fillers. Finally, Cena versus Jericho versus Big Show was Cena in the middle until the tag champs fell out. Jericho picked up the scraps then DX joined in and got their asses kicked.
Mythbusters [19:00, Discovery] Is it possible to survive buried alive? Jamie tried it in a steel coffin, which began to buckle & leak as earth was piled on to it, and the guys decided that the air in the coffin wouldn't last a couple of days, as in the myths, so Busted. Next up, Coke myths. Will it remove bloodstains? Yes. Polish chrome? Yes. Free rusty bolts? No. Shine a penny? Yes. Dissolve a tooth? No. Dissolve steak? No.
   If you fall off a bridge, will throwing a hammer ahead of you break the surface tension of the water and let you survive? Buster was dropped 50 metres from a crane, lost both legs and there was no hammer effect. Busted. Will Coke clean corroded car battery terminals? No better than water. Remove grease stains on cloth? No. Degrease an engine? No. Is it a spermicide? No.
Earth Without The Moon [20:00, National Geographic] If the distance between the Moon and the Earth increases by more than 10% of the present distance, the Earth's rotation will become chaotic and it will be unable to support life. And there will be no more total eclipses of the Sun, higher sea levels away from the equator and ice caps forming and melting all over the place over a period of 6 months.
   The Earth would look like Mars without the Moon, which is moving away at 3.8 cm/year, and life would probably never have developed. The programme suggested that life could never develop to a high level on a planet without a moon like ours. Then the good news: the Sun will become a red giant and swallow the Earth before the Moon retreats far enough to stop protecting the Earth!
NCIS [Code of Conduct, 21:00, FX] A dead Marine at Halloween in his car; not suicide, Dr. Mallard decided. Cpl. Corby, a notorious practical joker, had been killed by drinking liquid nitrogen! Dinozzo decided the wife was the killer, and she had a history of marrying Marines, who had died. Wrong! It was the step-daughter, who was the child of neither step-parent, trying to get her hands on a big wedge of cash.
WW$mackDown! [22:00, Sky Sports 3] Ranting and Undertaker sorted out Jericho. Ziggles and the Harts had the ref on their side, so Nitro & Cryme Tyme had no chance. The wretched Mysterio/Batista story was pursued further. Glamzilla beat up a little girl called Brittney. McIntyre versus Jimmy Yang was a load of rubbish and a waste of Yang's obvious talents.
   Mysterio versus Mike Knox had all the hallmarks of a massacre but the guys kept things going for a fair time and Mysterio was handed a famous victory. Punky versus Truth was a similar bout of similar length, but with a comedy ending. Punk told the ref to count faster, Truth snuck up on him and the ref delivered a lighting pin count.
   The Vault: Undertaker versus Mysterio. Matt Hardy versus Batista wasn't a mismatch on the scale of Mysterio's but it went the same way with Batista being zapped from time to time. When Batista turned nasty, he was duly DQ'd and threw a hissy fit.

[Saturday, 07th] City On Fire (2008) [19:00, Hallmark] The temperature is going up and up around L.A. and Dr. Kate at GRC is upset because Charles, the English meteorologist, has Lab A. Her weather control experiments from Lab B eat up cash and haven't produced anything good. UniCorp, which employs Charles, is drilling for methane around L.A. and planning to be a major player in the energy market.
   UniCorp's drilling for methane is causing uncontrollable wildfires and Dr. Kate reckons the city will burn up before sundown! She finds that UniCorp is to blame for the fires, having corrupted the governor of California. Mr. UniCorp takes over GRC at gunpoint to keep his drilling going. But he croaks from the heat and Dr. Kate sets up a silver iodide drop. Surprise! It starts raining and L.A. is saved. So Dr. Kate gets Lab A.
TNA Impact [21:00, Bravo] Hulk Hogan is aboard and Dixie, the boss, expects everyone to back her changes or get lost. A.J. did a rant at whoever's been attacking him, so Daniels ranted back at him. Beer Money looked like getting the better of Eric Young and Big Rob so they cheated, Eric hit Big Rob with his belt 'by mistake' and Beer Money did win. Security had to sort out a shambles when the Brits then the Guns joined in.
   Des Wolfe had a joke match then he ranted at Kurt Mangled. Daniels versus Styles didn't happen due to individual assaults. So it was Tara versus Hamada instead. Hamade did a spot of rope-walking, Undertaker style, but Tara saw her off. Kong rushed out but Tara zapped her and Security joined in.
ECW Late Night [22:00, Sky Sports 3] A rant from Christian, who was killed by Regal last week. He bashed Regal before the Englishman's match with Goldust, who was allowed to do a lot before having to lie down. Ryder versus Benjamin involved a lot of leaping about and a joke finish; Ryder was zapped while looking at Rosa. The Hurricane and the Burchills jawed. Vance Archer, the latest big bloke, killed a local sacrifice from Rhode Island.
   Finally, Jackson & Koslov took on Christian & Yoshi, who got a lot to do at the start. Eventually, Joshi jumped onto Jackson and flattened him at ringside while Christian was making Koslov unprettier prior to a pin. Then Regal joined in a beat-down of Christian.
Back to TNA [23:00, Bravo+1] to see Mick Foley rant at Abyss. Homicide versus Lashley didn't last long, and after killing Homicide, Lashley did the same backstage to the Big Fat Fruity Baddy for harassing Mrs. Lashley. Meanwhile, Homicide zapped ref Earl Hebner by sneaking up on his guide dog's blind side so Amazing Red zapped Homicide.
   Medicine versus Taylor didn't last long, so the rest of the Beautiful People, Sarita & ODB joined in for a shambles. Daniels versus Styles was just a set up for an assault by Samoa Joe on A.J. Finally, the Dudleys versus Morgan & Hernandez fizzled out with steel chair shots by Bubbah for lame script reasons, then Rhino zapped both Morgan & Hernandez.

[Sunday, 08th] Valencia MotoGP [13:00, BBC 2] The last round of the season started with Stoner, Pedrosa & Lorenzo on the front row, but Stoner fell off during the parade lap and didn't start!! Elias nipped up to 2nd behind Pedrosa but Lorenzo then Rossi nipped past him at the start of lap 4/30.
   Lorenzo had a mighty wobble and nearly fell off in the next lap, and Rossi took 2nd place from him. De Punier had a similar big moment later on. Edwards took 4th place and his team mate for next year, Mr. Spies, got ahead of Dovizioso to make Edwards 5th in the championship behind Stoner.
NFL Sunday [18:03, Sky Sports 2], the Texans at the Colts. The Colts were encouraged to go for a 4th & 1 but didn't make it. But their next drive produced a TD. Shaub promptly threw an interception into the middle of 3 Colts, the Texans continued to give up stupid penalties but they held the Colts of a FG. 0-10. The Colts added another FG early in the 2nd quarter, 0-13, and sacked Schaub to send the Texans 3 & out again.
   The Texans made a 4th & 1 with under 4 minutes of the half to go, but their drive fizzled out with a fumble at the 1 yard line and a touch-back. The Colts drove to FG range but Manning was intercepted and the Texans kicked a 56 yard FG to go in 3-13 down at half time.
   The Texans came out for the 3rd quarter ready to play, made big gains and scored a TD. The 4th quarter started with the Texans 1 yard from the Colts' end zone and they rushed in for a TD right away. 17-13. Williams got a sack, a defensive penalty on the Texans kept the Colts' drive going, but Wayne tossed a pass on a trick play and was intercepted.
   After sending the Texans 3 & out, the Colts built a TD drive to go 17-20 up. The Texans were stopped by a fumble, they came back, they had a chance to tie the match with a 42 yard FG with 1 second left on the clock . . . but the kick missed. Bummer!
Next, the Chargers at the Giants [21:16, Sky Sports 2]. The Giants started well but a FG try was botched; the kicker seemed to think they were running a fake! The Chargers started the 2nd quarter with a 10 yard TD pass from Rivers to Jackson. 7-0. Eli Manning did a lot of running, the Giants survived a fumble by him when sacked, they made a 3rd & 18 and Smith took a TD pass after a 10½ minute drive. 7-7. The Chargers looked like finishing the half with a long FG try but the ball was knocked out of Rivers' grasp for a loss.
   In the 3rd quarter, Gates dropped a long pass and the next play was intercepted. Another drop by Gates stopped the next Chargers' drive. Manning did some more running. Pass interference in the Giants' end zone put the Chargers at the 1 and Wilson took an easy TD pass. 14-7.
   A SD challenge made the Giants kick a 38 yard FG instead of a 28-yarder. 14-10. A sack by Robbins started the Chargers going backwards. Their punt gave the Giants a short field and they took the lead with a TD. 14-17. Manning was startled then sacked to end the next Giants' drive. But Rivers' first play was intercepted and the Giants went further ahead with a FG. 14-20.
   2:07 left and the Chargers had to go 80 yards and score a TD. Which they did; Rivers firing an 18 yard pass to Jackson for his 2nd TD of the match. The Giants had 21 seconds to make something happen and Merriman finished the match with his 2nd sack on Manning.

[Monday, 09th] Murdoch Mysteries [The Annoying Red Planet, 19:00, Alibi] A bloke found dead up a tree, Gaston, had a persecution complex: Martians were after him. A company planning to build a dam wanted to buy his land and he was the last hold-out. The chief constable warned the inspector off as Murdoch & Crabtree investigated crop circles.
   Another man was found murdered; he had his internal organs sucked out just like a dead cow found earlier. Murdoch & Co. had a close encounter with an airship. Was the land company co-operating with the Martians? No, it was Russians working with the British and American governments, Gaston had been mistaken for a French agent (the second body), and everything was covered up.
Chuck [pilot, 20:00, Bravo] is being shown again from the beginning here. Chuck isn't enjoying his birthday party while Bryce of the CIA, Chuck's room mate at Stanford, is sending him the Intersect data in an email before blowing up the computer and being shot by Casey of the NSA. Casey is sent to L.A. to find out who has America's secrets. Sarah of the CIA, Bryce's former girlfriend, also turns up at the Buy More, where Chuck wants to be the Ass. Man.
   Chuck keeps having flashes. Sarah wrecks his computer. His date with her becomes a battle between the CIA and the NSA. Chuck causes a truce until he saves a general from being blown up. "You need me," he tells Sarah & Casey. So they are posted to the Buy More.
NUMB3RS [Tabu, 21:00, Five US] A hugely wealthy businessman's daughter is kidnapped by the PNA (c.f. the SLA). They want dad to close down his sweat shops and pay a $40M ranson. He offers $10M. The daughter is shown taking part in a robbery – Patty Hearst all over again? No, she starts the shooting when the Feds catch up with the gang.
   Agent Megan thinks Ella has been brainwashed but the PNA members are all losers from her highschool and she's throwing a hissy fit because her dad hasn't been paying her enough attention. Ella starts another war when the Feds surround the PNA HQ, but the good guys win. As usual.
Burn Notice [Scatter Point Burn, 22:00, FX] Mike & Co. go from Carla's mailbox to her office. Mike's client is Trevor, a reformed getaway driver, who's being pushed into another job by Timo. Mike tries to get the job called off but he ends up joining the gang as a safe-cracker. Sam's girlfriend wants to marry him but he's married already.
   The robbery deflects Mike from taking a crack at Carla's office. Timo's job is sabotaged and Mike gets him killed by the female psycho in the gang. Sam's girlfriend dumps him. And when Mike finally gets into Carla's office, he finds that she's way smarter than he thought.

[Tuesday, 10th] Maisie Raine [Go Bananas, 1998, 19:00, Alibi] The host of Masie's favourite TV game show has a stalker. The DCI doesn't think she should waste time on such a thin case and the Super wants her to learn golf. Matthew has a disgruntled Scot as a prime suspect, but it's not him. Matthew is just after sympathy to stop his show being cancelled, and Masie blows the scam unwittingly on live TV.
Stargate Universe [Earth, 20:00, Sky One] Earth had a way to get the people on Destiny home, which involved sending Col. Young, Eli & Chloe home to visit their families. General O'Neill told Col. Young to get on with it when he didn't like the rescue plan, and the strategy was to keep Col. Telford aboard Destiny to make sure the plan was rammed through over Dr. Rush's objections.
   Col. Telford started shooting off the guns to waste power, Destiny dropped out of FTL to refuel at another star, Telford dialled the stargate and the shields started failing. So Dr. Rush sent Telford and his 2 sidekicks home. Then he admitted that he sabotaged the rescue plan because he thought it wouldn't work. Col. Young told Eli to find out what Dr. Rush is hiding. And at the end, back on Earth, Telford went calling on Mrs. Rush.
CSI:Miami [Wolfe In Sheep's Clothing, 21:00, Channel 5] Wolfe was told to make a robbery/homicide go away and dumped. He returned to work looking remarkably undamaged after a severe beating and amateur dentistry. The guy who parachuted off a building with $2 million was bagged so the Russian phoned Wolfe with orders to let the guy walk.
   The doorman was framed for the murder but the Cheesie were suspicious; almost as suspicious as Calleigh and Eric became of Wolfe, who had told Horatio that Billy, the son of a guy whose debt Wolfe had taken over, had been kidnapped by the Russian. The parachuting thief was re-popped and persuaded to talk.
   The Russian was tracked down while he was on the phone to Wolfe, and Horatio got to shoot him when the Russian was about to shoot the kid. The dead broker's assistant was busted next, and she turned out to be a member of the Russian Mob.

[Wednesday, 11th] NUMB3RS [19:00, In Plain Sight, Five US] Don Epps and the gang were chasing a major meth manufacturer while Charlie Epps was drowning in childhood guilt and he wanted to find a girl whom he thought was being abused. Luckily, the girl was the bad guy's daughter and he was trying to use the Feds to track down the girl and her mother. But Social Services were trying to grab the kid for fostering, which upset Charlie even more. The bad guy was popped, and Charlie ended up even more upset because he wasn't allowed to kill him.
Chuck Vs The Tango [20:00, Bravo] Chuck was dragged to an art auction as his first field mission and ended up doing the tango with La Cuidad, the world's most notorious arms dealer, who was thought to be a bloke because no one knew much about her. His protection team had a battle with MI6. Chuck survived a shoot-out while Morgan's plan to get Chuck made Ass. Man. went pear shaped. La Ciudad's muscle pursued Chuck to the Buy More, but his team was up to the job of sorting them out.
Atomic Twister (2002) [21:00, Sci-Fi] Mom & her kid wait until the last minute before taking refuge from a tornado and mom is killed; natural deselection of the stupid. Grown up Jake's glammy neighbour runs a power station in Tennessee which is assaulted by a tornado. The control room loses power and the satellite dish is taken out. Another twister hits the plant and the cavalry from the NRC is grounded. The cooling system starts failing and another Chernobyl looms.
   Neville, who shut down some of the pumps to save power, has to kill himself doing a manual shutdown of the reactor. Jake has to save his neighbour's horrible kid and the sheriff's daughter, who dumped him, then he saves the nuclear reactor. Everyone ends up a hero; apart from the idiot who put a nuclear reactor in Tornado Alley, of course.

[Thursday, 12th] Mythbusters [18:00, Discovery] Is there a difference in strike damage caused by a frozen or fresh bird? Jamie & Adam bought a bit of aircraft, built a powerful air cannon and blasted away. And both types of chicken did the same amount of damage. Next, a silly story about a guy standing on a 50lb load in a washing machine, which was busted every step of the way.
   A load that big won't go into a washing machine and the guys had to rebuild theirs with a powerful motor to spin Buster. A side myth that dog pee + baking soad = explosion was also busted. Can octopus eggs hatch in the human stomach? This myth is as daft as the one about the washing machine. Adam & Jamie ran tests with prawn eggs and tadpoles, and the myth stayed busted.
Chuck Vs The Wookie [20:00, Bravo] Sarah survived an evening with the Bartowskis then Karina, a rogue DEA agent, turned up wanting to use Chuck to help her steal a diamond, which was in the hands of a hairy bad guy. Karina told Chuck that Bryce was Sarah's boyfriend as well as her partner. Then it was off to Malibu and Karina disappeared off on a jet ski with the rock.
   Luckily, Casey had her bugged. Karina planted the diamond on Morgan and Chuck found it. Sarah & Casey were grabbed, so Chuck shamed Korina into a rescue mission, they blew a major arms deal by bad guys, who were planning to use the diamond as payment, and Sarah told Chuck her real name is Lisa.
WW$ Raw [22:00, Sky Sports 3] Ricky Hatton was the guest host in Sheffield, England. Alicia flattened Kelly quite quickly to remain No. 1 contender. Sheamus was unimpressive against an English guy half his size. Swagger was as unimpressive against Evan Bourne and his winning streak for the rest of the year went phut. Festoons of fillers.
   Henry versus Orton failed to convince as it was so obvious that the World's Strongest Man was lying down for the untalented Orton. Hatton vs Chavo was boxer against wrestler and the wrestler had to pretend to be knocked out. Fillers from last week is a bit bloody much but showing the same filler twice is inexcusable.
   Finally, Jericho & Big Show took on DX, so a tough time for Mr. Michaels, then a tough time for HHH. Then BS flattened Jericho 'by mistake' and HBK picked up the pieces.

[Friday, 13th] NFL Special [19:00, Sky Sports Xtra] Highlights of the Bears in San Francisco. After sending the Bears 3 & out, the 49ers drove into FG range, Harris got a sack and the kick missed. When the Bears got close in the 2nd quarter, Cutler was intercepted when he threw to 3 defenders. Both QBs then threw a string of drive-ending interceptions, and the 49ers scored a TD from a turnover with 2 minutes of the half left. Which gave the Bears time to kick a FG. 3-7 at half time.
   Cutler continued to throw interceptions, the Bears continued to give up penalties. But their defence managed to stop the 49ers and the offence added a FG to their tally. 6-7. Another interception thrown by Cutler in the 4th quarter led to a SF FG. 6-10. The flag-fest continued. The Bears were in the SF red zone with 13 seconds left, in a position to win, but pick No. 5 for Cutler in the SF end zone meant game over.
NCIS [Outlaws & In-Laws, 21:00, FX] Gibbs' sailboat floated into the San Diego naval base with 2 dead guys aboard and Mike Franks became the prime suspect. The Director got the hump with Gibbs and Franks told Gibbs a string of lies. Then he admitted shooting the men at his home in Mexico. They were dishonourably discharged ex-servicemen, who worked for Col. Bell, a big wheel in the Iraq security industry.
   Franks said he was protecting Layla, his daughter in law, and his grand daughter. Layla's mom had hired Col. Bell to get the girls back after they escaped from Iraq. Franks didn't kill the dead guys, he just messed up the forensic. Bell went on with the job, Gibb's place was wrecked and Bell got a free trip to Mexico, where bounty hunting is illegal.
WW$ RAW [22:00, Sky Sports 3] Chunky Monkey Punky with a whinge at the UK then a rant from Truth before their match, which went on for a fairly long time before the 'straight edge' Punk cheated to win while the ref carefully averted his eyes. Mickie faced chunky Natalya, who applied an impressive surfboard, but this was ritual humiliation from outside aimed at Mickie rather than a serious match.
   The Vault: Undertaker versus Khali. McIntyre versus Finlay was brutality on brutality, both men were DQ'd and Finlay was clobbered with his own club when he brought it into play. Mysterio & Batista had a contract signing, which Mysterio won. Nitro versus Ziggles was all Ziggler for a long time but it ended with a double count-out after they fell off the post
   Glamzilla beat up a smaller opponent. Big deal. Finally, Jericho & Undertaker took turns to beat each other up, Jericho offered lots of cheek and countered all of Taker's signature moves; until he ended up in Hell's Gate. Big Show joined in to dish out some ritual humiliation but Kane put the tag champs to flight to set up next week's big match.

[Saturday, 14th] TNA Impact [21:00, Bravo] Who is Super Dave Osborne? Apart from tonight's guest visitor, of course. Dr. Stevie had a joke match with Abyss aimed at announcing Raven's return. Alissa crunched Traci's arm too much for comfort, so she indulged in some post-match sore losership when the 'Future Legend' turned her back. Jay Lethal versus Jim 'The Anvil' Neidhart had the hallmarks of another joke match but old & fat Jim got to dish out a lethal power slam.
   Lashley got the night off to go and play silly buggers with the Big Fat Fruity Baddie. The Beautiful People + Kong versus everyone else was the expected shambles and it was Taylor who got her implants busted. Des Wolfe did some lying down for Kurt Mangled then he zapped the former Olympic hero.
   The Guns + Red versus World Elite saw Homicide chucked out for trying to use a barbed wire bat and the other 2 crunched. A loada ranting. Beer Money took on a couple of Brits, who had the handicap of not being able to get themselves DQ'd without losing and couldn't hack it. Plus BM were scripted to win.
   Finally, Samoa Joe versus A.J. was announced as having a 20-minute time limit, but it started with 5 minutes of the programme to go and Daniels helped Styles to lose after about 3 minutes.
Sky TV were twatting about with what they advertised and what they actually showed, so over to ESPN America [23:00] to watch the end of Iowa versus Ohio State, where the score was 17-24 with over 9 minutes of the 4th quarter to go. It was 24-all when time ran out, which gave NFL fans a chance to see how college football handles overtime.
   The teams start 25 yards from the end zone and take alternate tries until someone has won. Both teams get a shot in each round, and after the 1st round, the teams have to go for a 2-point conversion after a TD to speed a win. Iowa were stopped and the Ohio kicker, who'd missed a 47-yard try in the 4th quarter, managed a 37-yarder for the win.

[Sunday, 15th] NFL Sunday [18:03, Sky Sports 2] The Bengals in Pittsburgh. The Bengals came out passing to a long FG try, which hit the right upright for nul points. Roethlisberger ran for a 1st down after a sack, going 15 yards on a 3rd & 13 to the CB 15, but the Steelers were held to a FG. 0-3. Scott then returned the kick-off 96 yards for a TD after Reed wimped out of a tackle. 6-3 after the holder dropped the ball during the PAT try.
   R'berger was sacked again and the punters got a lot of work into the 2nd quarter. The Steelers drove inside the CB 10 but had to kick a FG after another sack. 6-6, 4 minutes left. Palmer was sacked. The Steelers benefitted from a 46 yard pass interference penalty and drove inside the CB 10 again. Sack #4 on R'berger and just another FG. 6-9 at half time.
   In the 3rd quarter, the Steelers were stopped when a pass bounced off Ward's helmet to the Bengals, who tied the scores at 9 with the inevitable FG. Another FG put the Bengals back into the lead. Palmer was sacked back at his own 1 yard line. The Steelers drove into the 4th quarter, made a 4th & 1 foot at the CB 10½ line but had to kick a FG. 12-12.
   Another FG put the Bengals ahead, and Graham hit his 4th FG after the 2-minute warning to make the score 18-12. The Steelers were sent 4 & out, and that was it. The former Cincinnati "Bungles" have swept the Ravens, the Steelers have just joined that list and they're already 1 win up on the Browns.
Next up, the Cowboys at Lambeau Field [21:16, Sky Sports 2] The match was to prove a field day for the defences. The Packers went 3 & out, Collins sacked Romo and a DC FG try was NG. The Cowboys lost a sack to a face mask penalty, but Rodgers was in for another torrid time!
   Barnett sacked Romo in the 2nd quarter. The defences held up. Williams, a Dallas receiver, caught a pass and fumbled it away to the Pack. But Rodgers was sacked on successive plays and the Pack punted. Sack #3 on Romo and the Packers prevented the first scoreless 1st half of the season with a 48 yard FG. 0-3.
   Lots more sacking in the 3rd quarter. Rogers fired the 1st pass to an end zone in the 4th quarter! The Packers' coach made a dumb challenge and lost a time out. But Rodgers was able to find a receiver with a TD pass for a 0-10 lead. Woodson sacked Romo, who fumbled and the Packers had the ball at the DC 3. Hegner stood in the end zone and collected a TD pass. 0-17.
   The Pack failed to get away with a 3rd challenge. The Cowboys reached the GB 1 on pass interference, only to see Woodson intercept the next play. The Pack ran the ball and time off the clock, but the Cowboys bust a gut and scored a TD to avoid the shut-out. 7-17 final and the fans left wondering which Packers' team will show up on Thursday.

[Monday, 16th] Murdoch Mysteries [The Rebel & the Prince, 19:00, Alibi] Murdoch & Crabtree had to protect Prince Alfred from Irish terrorists in Trono. A woman called Maggie was killed by a masked man in a park. She was found to have an Irish terrorist tattoo and the key to a cypher in her stomach.
   The police started looking for the mysterious John Tucker. Murdoch found the Bible used with the key. Shock-horror! The prince's batman was Tucker! And Murdoch's old pal Eddie was one of the scumbag killers. But Trono's finest triumphed yet again and the bad guys came to bad ends.
NUMB3RS [Graphic, 21:00, Five US] A robbery with violence & murder bagged the only issue of a comic from the 1960s. Scammers started selling fakes, so Charlie did a map of the sales. The Feds busted a guy who bought the old paper used for the fakes. Megan decided he wasn't the trigger-happy psycho. And there was a guy doing an article on best-selling author Charlie for a magazine.
   Agent Dave did a superhero plunge and the psycho ended up dead. Charlie deduced that the real comic would be put into a sale of fakes, and he paid $20,000 an item in the auction. The rest of the thieves were trapped and the old wreck of an artist got the real comic back.
Burn Notice [Bad Blood, 22:00, FX] Victor [Dr. Jackson of SG1] crashed into Mike's life to order him to take part in a robbery for Carla. Sam got the job of baby-sitting Mike's mom to protect her. Ricky wanted Mike to find $2M, which someone else had stolen with a view to framing him. Victor did his best to screw up Mike's deal with Eddie, who stole the cash.
   Mike built an X-ray machine in his boot to find out what Victor was after. Then he told Eddie he'd have to kill Rickie. But the gun contained blanks and Valentine, their boss, was listening to Eddie's rant of explanation. So Eddie was disappeared and Victor bagged a sniper rifle.
Derren Brown presents The 3D Magic Spectacular [23:00, Channel 4+1] There were periods of genuine 3D some of the time but there were long periods when it was difficult to make out much detail of what was happening. Captions were also pretty impossible to read. The magic was okay but 3D done this way with such dark filters in the glasses is a curiosity, not something of which the people will demand more and more.

[Tuesday, 17th] Maisie Raine [An Ordinary Little Tragedy, 19:00, Alibi] Maisie was pining for her dead husband on the anniversary of his death and scrapping with the DCI over Gabby, a woman of 28, who had vanished. It turned out that she had taken a few days away from her crazy parents. And the day after she returned, she was dead. The family had already lost one daughter to a road accident, and the crazy father killed Gabby because she said she was planning to go travelling. So the crazy parents ended up with no children.
Stargate Universe [Time, 20:00, Sky One] Destiny stopped at a jungle planet and people started keeling over. Then we found out that the crew was watching a data recording of themselves, which Eli had found at the planet's stargate. He started talking about alternate realities but a solar flare from the local star had disrupted the wormhole and sent a recording back in time.
   The crew saw an awful future, in which they were killed on Destiny by bugs which had come with the water from the ice planet, and killed on the jungle planet by nocturnal monsters, whose venom contained an antidote to the ice-planet bugs. But at the end, the last survivor of a possible future crew told them to go after the monsters in daylight, while they were asleep.
CSI:Miami [Chip/Tuck, 21:00, Channel 5] A guy moaning about noise found that someone had gone into a wood-chipper and he got rained on. What a mess! The victim was a weird plastic surgeon, who'd tried to turn the neighbour's wife into a copy of his dead wife; and failed miserably leaving her looking like a monster. The allegedly dead Ron, killed by an explosion caused by Horatio, turned out to be another of the dead guy's patients.
   Rick was handling Ron, who was exposing drug dealers and untouchable. Horatio warned Julia, his ex-wife, that she was a target. The Cheesies eventually framed a woman who had been made to look like the surgeon's dead wife for the murder, using a silly story about hair mites and by threatening her son.

[Wednesday, 18th] Chuck Vs The Truth [20:00, Bravo] Chuck met & fancied Lou from the sandwich shop, but he couldn't do anything about it because of his cover relationship with Sarah. Then he became involved with thwarting a guy who had a deadly truth serum, which put Ellie in her own hospital. Then everyone else got a dose.
   Chuck learnt that his 'relationship' with Sarah was going nowhere. The bad guy was sorted out. Casey rid the Buy More of the nosy & bossy Harry Tang and Chuck decided that he and Sarah would have to have a ceremonial break-up of their non-relationship so that he could chase after Lou.
Out of Egypt : Shape of the Gods [21:00, Discovery] Dr. Kara Cooney, an Egyptologist, started off there, looking at the pyramids, then went on a world tour looking at other pyramids to compare and contrast the motives behind the rulers who commissioned them. In Egypt, the concept was a perfect represenation of Ra, the sun god, and ensuring eternal life for the pyramid's occupant. In South America, political power and bloody sacrifices to the gods tended to be the rule.
   In Ceylon, decorative pyramids invited worshippers into temples. Buddhist pyramids shapes were all about glorifying the Buddha. Cambodian cities were full of them! Expressions of political power and contact with the gods were fairly universal motives. And Dr. Cooney finished off in Dubai looking at the world's tallest building which, she felt, was an elite making a highly visible connection to the sky to prove who was in charge.

[Thursday, 19th] Living On The Moon [18:00, National Geographic] It's 2020 and NASA is sending astronauts to the Moon's south pole for a week. This programme examines the bits and pieces needed to get them there and back, and keep them going for their away week. There is also the prosepect of India & China setting up bases on the Moon, but no mention of Russia. It looks like it will be very cool to be around in 2050 with enough cash to take a holiday at a lunar hotel.
Special Unit 2 is showing on Zone Horror [The Web, 19:00]. Tonight's offering was about a lethal spiderwoman. The psycho O'Malley and his sidekick Benson had to rescue Alice, a witness, from the control freak doctor at an asylum. O'Malley did it at gunpoint after shooting up her ward when the spiderwoman dropped in.
   O'Malley spotted the spiderwoman on a club's CCTV and Benson reported there was a whole bunch of them. So O'Malley got to take out the building where they had their nest with red ammo. But oh, no! Alice got friendly with O'Malley and she was one of the spiderpersons!
Chuck Vs The Imported Hard Salami [20:00, Bravo] Chuck dumped Sarah and the General ordered him to get close to Lou's ex-boyfriend, a crooked Greek club owner. Sarah crashed in and screwed up the date. An attempt to intercept Stavros' shipment flopped and tipped off the bad guys. Chuck blew it with Lou.
   Sarah got herself & Chuck locked in Stavros' boot. Casey brought the cavalry and Stavros' 'bomb' didn't explode. Casey told Lou that Chuck was a Federal snitch, so Chuck ended up back with Sarah. Morgan took up with Anna, dumped her and regretted it. And the 'bomb' contained Bryce, who was still alive!!
The Detonators [20:00, Discovery] The job was to blow up the rusty old Liberty Memorial bridge at Bismark, N. Dakota without taking out a new one just 6 metres away and breaking windows of riverside properties. The plan was to use shaped charges to drop one section of the bridge into the Missouri river, clear that bit to allow traffic on the river, then blow the rest.
   Our expert took us on a side trip to demolishing the roof of the Miami Arena, another shaped charge job, then it was back to watch the bridge being blown up in 2 episodes. Clean blasts both times, no damage to the new bridge and no broken windows.
WW$ Raw [23:20, Sky Sports 3, late due to snooker] A convention of codgers then Mizrabul didn't take long to do in MVP. Chavo & Santino larked about with a contribution from the LGB, to whom HHH administered a Pedigree for infringing DX's copyright. Melina & Alysha had a short rumble with lumberjills, who got nothing to do.
   Sheamus wasted some of our time. Bourne versus Swagger was another waste of Bourne's talents. Orton pratted about a bit with Roddy Piper, then Kofi got rid of him. Twice. Then he came back to deliver a good marmalyzing, lay Orton out on a desk and leap on to the scumbag.

[Friday, 20th] Raw remainder [18:00, Sky Sports 3] Loads more jawing then Jericho & Big Show went against DX and Cena + the Undertaker in a triple threat tag match at Madison Square Garden. Bashing, shambles, double-teaming, Taker versus BS, carnage and chaos reigned. Finally, HHH had to lie down for Cena, so the Undertaker gave his tag partner a Tombstone pile-driver to show him who's boss.
Special Unit 2 [The Waste, 19:00, Zone Horror] Liposucked fat turned into a link, which prowled Chicago looking for fat people to demolish. A hotshot detective, Rick, O'Malley's first partner, refused to be chucked off the case, and he was busted when the Link killed a cop. The monster ate a huge tank of human fat, then disappeared into the sewers. It stole O'Malley's car, and O'Malley got to shoot Rick, to stop him being a pest, before he blew the fat monster away.
Chuck Vs The Nemesis [20:00, Bravo] Big Mike was antsy about Black Friday at the Buy More and Ellie was having a Thanksgiving party. Chuck found out that Casey shot Bryce and Fulcrum is after the Intersect, i.e. him. Bryce said he wasn't a rogue agent and he wanted to turn himself in to the real CIA, avoiding the Fulcrum infiltraitors.
   That was set up for Black Friday, Fulcrum turned up in force and shot the store to bits, and being able to speak Klingon kept Chuck alive. Then Bryce went after Fulcrum 'off the radar', and Sarah didn't go with him.
WW$mackDown! [23:00, Sky Sports 3] Batista threw a hissy fit at Matt Hardy for a change, and he didn't look happy even after delivering a Batista Bomb. Finlay versus McIntyre again didn't last long and a DDT settled Finlay's hash. Punk wasted a lot of time before Mr. Truth gave him a whiskey bath.
   Nitro versus Ziggler, again, was the best of 3 falls, unusually. Nitro got the first fall unexpectedly while having his belly battered and, unexpectedly, Ziggles didn't get an equalizing fall before Nitro finished him off. Mickie didn't take long to see off Layla and suffer more cyber-bullying. Tyson Kidd versus Mysterio fizzled out when Batista joined in, so Mysterio embarrassed the Animal again.
   Finally, Jericho & Big Show against the Brothers of Destruction, so a thin time for Jericho, double-teaming for BS, some lying down by the big men, shambles and everyone out of the ring, and a joke finish with Jericho zapping BS and running away.

[Saturday, 21st] Rosemary & Thyme [They Understand Me In Paris, 20:00, ITV 3] The ladies arrived in France to do a job for Rosie's old pal Dorothy, and her old man was done in during the night with a robbery on the side. The ladies decided that Dot's 'nephew', Nick, was blackmailing her. The loot from the robbery turned up & vanished again.
   James, the pesky neighbour was done in next. Laura saw the loot in Nick's car, and he turned out to be her illegitimate son, who was blackmailing her. James had tried to do the same. Vincent, another neighbour, said he did the murders but Dorothy confessed.
TNA Impact [21:00, Bravo] After ranting, the Big Fat Fruity Baddie versus Amazing Red was a slow motion massacre until Lashley butted in. The Guns & Beer Money versus 2 Brits, Daivari & Kiyoshi was a recipe for a shambles, and the Guns had the last word in the ring. Hamada versus Taylor was fast & furious, and settled with a Hamada Driver.
   Mick Foley was a no-show for his tag match with Abyss against Dr. Stevie & Raven, so Abyss was zapped and Foley was zapped later backstage. Sarita did a lot of lying down against Alissa before booting her way to victory.
ECW Late Night [22:30, Sky Sports 3] Benjamin never got to grips with Ryder. Burchill had to beat the Hurricane to unmask him or leave ECW. Their match went on for a long time by non-ppv standards, Hurricane wouldn't stay down, they half-killed each other with a flop off the post and Hurricane got the pin. Vance Arthur versus a smaller guy, natch.
   Punk & the 'diabolical' Wm. Regal took on Christian & R-Truth. It was Christian versus Regal and Truth versus Punk a lot of the time. Truth got his leg crunched and the ref turned his back on the bad guys' swindle.
The rest of TNA [23:30, Bravo+1] The Dudleys + Rhino had a street fight with Morgan, Hernandez & the Pope. Dvon got his nuts crushed, Bubbah got out of the way and let Morgan put himself through a table at ringside, the Pope was crunched with a 3D, and PO Jesse, tattooed and with a Mohican, did in Hernandez behind the ref's back.
   Finally, Woolfe & Daniels took on Angle & Styles. Would the ring be big enough for all those egos? Just about. At the end, Wolfe ran away after getting a good crunching and Daniels flattened A.J. with the Best Moonsault Ever.

[Sunday, 22nd] NFL Sunday [18:02, Sky Sports 3] The Colts in Baltimore, where they came from. Manning's first deep pass flopped, the 2nd went for a huge gain to the BR 11 and a wide open Clark took a 3-yard TD pass one-handed! 7-0. A Ravens challenge wiped out a fumble ruling on the kick off return and they went on to a 46 yard FG. 7-3. Manning's first pass was tipped and intercepted, and that gave the Ravens another FG. 7-6.
   Manning was picked again inside the BR 10 in the 2nd quarter, and Reed took the ball back to the BR 48 on the way to another FG. 7-9. Addai rushed for another Colts' TD inside the last 2 minutes which left the Ravens time for another FG. 14-12 at the half.
   After sending the Ravens 3 & out, the Colts sliced through their defence, only to cough the ball up again at the BR 3. A huge pass from Flacco to Mason got the Ravens to midfield, they challenged another wrong fumble ruling and got to FG range, but the kick missed.
   In the 4th quarter, the Ravens were stopped 3 x at the Colts' goal line, so they went ahead with another FG. 14-15. The Colts replied with a FG. 17-15. Rice did some tough running but the Colts stopped the Ravens with an interception. They had to punt but Reed fumbled the ball to the Colts on the kick return. The End.
   This is one the Ravens could have won but the Colts are still unbeaten, like the Saints.
Next up, the Chargers in Denver. The Broncos ran the ball into FG range but Simms lost the ball when hit and the Chargers grabbed it. They marched down the field to a TD pass from Rivers to Naanee. 7-0. Simms held on to the ball when sacked again. The Chargers added a FG in the 2nd quarter, and extended their lead with a 47-yard FG. 13-0.
   Orton, bad ankle & all, replaced Simms and the Broncos went 60 yards in 2 plays to the SD 5. But Moreno had the ball kneed out of his grasp at the goal line by one of his own team for a touch back. A challenge failed and there was enough time left in the half for the Chargers to be stopped and Cromartie to intercept Orton.
   A big run by Moreno got the Broncos into FG range, and that's all they got. 13-3. The Broncos' on-side kick try flopped and the Chargers were soon at the DB 1, and it was TD for LT! 20-3. The Broncos failed to make a 4th & 5 with 4 minutes of the 3rd quarter left.
   The Chargers ran the ball, and time off the clock, and kicked a FG in the 4th quarter. 23-3. The Broncos punted after Orton was sacked. San Diego continued to charge to another FG, 26-3, then a TD. The final score was 32-3 as the extra point try was blocked.

[Monday, 23rd] Hallmark is rerunning The Mentalist [18:00] In the pilot, Patrick Jane is suspended after letting a woman shoot her killer husband. Then he buts in to a fake Red John double murder. Jane used to be a fake psychic until he did an uncomplimentary profile on Red John, who murdered his family and left him a "You didn't see that coming, Mr. Psychic" note. Jane does his thing and upsets all the cops by nailing the doctor who did the fake RJ murders.
Mythbusters [19:00, Discovery] Can you make a 'levitation machine' out of 2 vacuum cleaners? Adam & Jamie built rival hovercrafts; a huge clunker and one based on a surfboard respectively; and cheated. They also had their back ups pushing on a beach course. Conclusion: Plausible but Impractical.
   Does jumping into the air just before a falling lift crashes save your life? Jamie found a 92-foot drop at a derelict hotel and got the lift working for Buster to take a fall sitting on a spring. He ended up in pieces because the lift hit the ground going at 53 mph and he was fired upwards at about 8 mph. Myth, and Buster, Busted.
Chuck Vs The Crown Vic [20:00, Bravo] Sarah didn't go off with Bryce and Chuck flashed on a counterfeit note on the yacht of a guy who was big in the charity world. Sarah had to vamp the guy as Morgan was being shown off to Anna's parents. And it was Xmas. Chuck saved Morgan's life but wrote off Casey's car. And the General had a beta version of a new Intersect about to go on-line, and Casey would be allowed to take Chuck out when that happened!
NUMB3RS [Chinese Box, 21:00, Five US] A nutter shot his way into the Federal building and ended up with Agent Dave at mutual gunpoint in a lift. Charlie got the hump because Don wouldn't listen to a rambling strategy. SWAT was eager to shoot the nutter, who turned out to be paranoid because a retiring agent had been spying on him after employing him for political espionage.
   Pa Epps tossed in an idea about the lift; which contributed to Dave being shot in the flak jacket & disarmed. The SWAT leader was more inclinded to listen to Charlie than Don was, but it was Agent Dave who defused the nutter.
Burn Notice [Rough Seas, 22:00, FX] Fee put Mike in touch with Seymour to help him follow the trail of Carla's sniper rifle. Virgil returned to Miami to get Mike & Sam to help him recover a stolen shipment of medical supplies, so Mike had to keep Virgil & his mom apart. The thief was a psycho and he told Sam he's already sold the loot.
   Mike set up a scam for the psycho, and found the loot was somewhere in a vast warehouse. So he needed a Part 2. The cops got the psycho and the loot was returned to its rightful owner. And the sniper rifle is to be used for a night job by remote control?

[Tuesday, 24th] Stargate Universe [Life, 20:00, Sky One] Col. Young had everyone on a fitness crusade and the doctor doing psych evaluations. Dr. Rush found a neural interface of the sort that overloaded Col. O'Neill's brain and he was told study it, don't let a volunteer sit in it. Lt. Scott & Camilla got home visits and is Col. Telford having an affair with Mrs. Young?
   There are moves afoot to by-pass Young & Rush because they are seen to be obstacles to getting the people aboard Destiny back home. Dr. Rush announced that a probe flying ahead of the ship had found an 'Icharus' planet about a year ahead with the promise of a gate back to Earth. But Eli found that Rush had faked the data! He had done it to boost morale and he told Col. Young that all the answers they wanted were in the chair. But he chickened out of sitting in it himself.
CSI:Miami [Dead On Arrival, 21:00, Channel 5] Neil picked a million-dollar bride on a game show called "The Marrying Kind" only to find her dead in the back of a limo. The Cheesies scrambled around to fit someone up; the chauffeur, Caitlin (who was rejected in favour of Grace), the show's host, anyone. Wolfe spotted a stalker, who could be done only for trespassing.
   With time running out, the Cheesies decided that Marissa had stabbed Grace with a decanter stopper! Like anyone would use such an inept weapon! But the stalker turned out to have spent 15 years in gaol for attacking Caitlin when she was a child, so he went back to gaol for life after having another go at her. And Kyle, Horatio's horrible kid, looks like he's going to out the ME for substance abuse.
Robin Hood : Beyond Sherwood Forest (2009) [22:00, Sci-Fi] A flying monster kills the Sheriff of Nottingham then turns into a woman. Robert's dad is next in line for the sheriff's job but the evil Malcolm kills him, with Robert watching, and takes the woman/monster prisoner. 10 years later, Robin Hood steals a chest from Prince John's men in Sherwood.
   The sheriff puts extra taxes on the peasants to make them give up their champion and unleashes the monster. Friar Tuck is written off and Robin, Little John & Will head through a portal to the Dark Woods. Marion befriends the human part of the monster and the outlaws are captured. Robin & Co. return to Sherwood with some glowing pink berries..
   Robin runs into Sheriff Malcolm and is scheduled for hanging. But the outlaws stage a gaol break, Malcolm beats Robin in their fight and the monster arrrives. Malcolm slays the monster but Robin sneaks up on him, and Prince John is blackmailed into playing nice.

[Wednesday, 25th] Special Unit 2 [The Skin, 19:00, Zone Horror] Chicago was menaced with another shape-shifter of the sort that killed Julie, O'Malley's previous partner. That creature was taken out of its cell to help track down the latest one; and promptly escaped. O'Malley's tracking attempt flopped and the creatures turned out to be male & female instead of deadly rivals. So that meant that O'Malley & Benson had to take out a bunch of hatchlings as well as the parents.
Chuck Vs The Marlin [20:00, Bravo] Awesome wanted Chuck to look after an engagement ring, Chuck put it in his locker and everything in the Buy More was stolen (by the CIA) after Chuck drew Casey's attention to a bug. Chuck was threatened with being stashed if the Fulcrum recorder for the bugs wasn't found, Morgan got him into more trouble, as usual, but Sarah took out the lady Fulcrum agent, the Buy More was miraculously restocked and Chuck hauled the ring out of a skip.
Glass Trap (2005) [21:00, Zone Horror] Illegally imported trees from a nursery were delivered to a skyscraper and they started to find the flayed bones of staff members at the nursery. Giant ants started attacking people in the skyscraper! Agent Liz of the Dept. of Agriculture announced that the ants had been exposed to plutonium from Iraq and they were giant, angry and radioactive.
   Most of the people in the building made for the roof, most got away but an industrial spy screwed up the escape system and was splatted on the ground. A Dept. of Ag 'expert' shot one of his own men when the guy was attacked by a giant ant and he was cool with killing any people in the building if his DDT took out the ants. So the few survivors had 2 threats to flee from!

[Thursday, 26th] NFL Special, the Thanksgiving Event [17:30, Sky Sports 3] The Packers in Detroit. The Lions took 2 minutes to score a TD – the Packers having fumbled the ball to them on their opening drive. 8 minutes later, the Pack tried to kick a FG but missed. Still 0-7. Collins stopped the Lions with a pick, Rodgers found Driver with a 65 yard pass play on a 3rd & 10, and the Packers made it 7-7 up at the start of the 2nd quarter.
   The next GB drive produced a FG. 10-7. Williams intercepted Stafford, the Detroit defence held up and the Pack kicked a FG. 13-7. Woodson got the first sack, and Matthews finished the 1st half with another GB sack on Stafford.
   Woodson stopped the Lions with an interception but Rodgers fumbled when sacked by Peterson and it was the Lions' ball; for 3 & out. Driver took a pass 46 yards past midfield and he finished the GB drive with a TD pass reception. 20-7. The Pack almost got another interception and a 54 yard FG try by the Lions missed. A TD pass to Jones put the Packers 27-7 up.
   The Packers punted for the 1st time in the 4th quarter. Northcutt took a pass 47 yards then Smith went 16 yards to the GB 6, but the Lions were stopped on 4th & goal. So they made Grant fumble in his end zone and were awarded a TD. Which was reduced to a safety after a challenge. 27-9.
   The Lions added a FG to their tally, 27-12 with 5 minutes left. They sent the Pack 3 & out but Stafford's 1st play was intercepted by Woodson and returned for a TD. 34-12, game over and game really over when the Packers challenged again to get a fumble ruling and stop the Lions.
Next, off to see the Raiders in Dallas. [21:15, Sky Sports 3] Fargas ran the ball a bit for the Raiders but defences dominated at the start. Choice went 66 yards off a wildcat play to the OR 11, but the Cowboys went backwards and kicked a FG. 0-3. They extended their lead in the 2nd quarter with a 46 yard TD run by Jones. 0-10.
   Spencer sacked Gradkowski, Scott got one back on Romo and a 49 yard FG try by the Cowboys was NG. The officials wasted a lot of time taking a TD away from Austin inside the last 2 minutes but he was in the end zone for real 2 plays later. 0-17 at the half.
   The Cowboys started the 3rd quarter with a 38 yard pass to Witten and Scott sacked Romo again. The Raiders found themselves in Dallas territory for the first time, Gradkowski scrambled 20 yards to the DC 6 and a TD pass to Heyward Bey made it 7-17. Lots of punting into the 4th quarter.
   Witten went 44 yards with a pass, Williams took a TD pass and a score line of 7-24 made the match safe for the Cowboys with most of the final quarter left. Both defences held up and there was no more scoring.