![]() |
|
| |||||||
| Smoking is permitted on this website | ||||||||
TOTAL SCAMMOLOGY SYSTEMS Inc. presents: Computer Tonic® 2.39 Computer Tonic® is a program which turns any personal computer into a personal health spa. Many people suffer discomfort as a result of long hours spent at a computer. HOW IT WORKS Computer Tonic® Users Claim: Computer Tonic® runs in the background behind all other applications with any version of Windows from Windows 98 on. 250 Mb of free hard disk-space required. Full details from: Romiley PC Ware, 31, Riverside Drive, Romiley |
This disease of cattle & sheep is transmitted by midges invading from across the Channel, and it is widely seen as a divine judgement and yet another consequence of the labour party's failure to secure Britain's borders. |
|
ADVERTISEMENT
The excellent hardback book is yours for just £19.99 / €34.49 plus NO VAT because we don't believe in it. Buy it @ Romiley Bookstore, 101, Riverside Drive, Romiley |
A jury in Manchester has decided that putting labour minister margaret hodge in handcuffs is not a criminal offence. Currently MP for Barking, hodge has a long history of ignoring and covering up child abuse during her previous career as a local councillor, as the defendants in the case pointed out. The 2 Fathers4Justice members were both surprised and delighted by the verdict, which restored a tiny amount of faith in the sanity of the court system.
|
An outfit making fake £20 notes has been sent down after the police found their printing equipment and about half a million pounds in funny money at their base in Glasgow.
|
PUBLIC SERVICE ANNOUNCEMENT New on the World Wide Web This brilliant resource which exposes Nigerian-type 419 scams, bogus lotteries & job offers, phishing attempts and much, much more! |
The lady who played the lustful and good-humoured Miss Moneypenny in 14 James Bond films has died at 80. Born in Canada, Lois Maxwell came to England with the entertainment wing of the Canadian army. She met Roger Moore, a future James Bond, at RADA before heading for Hollywood, where she won a Golden Globe award as Most Promising Newcomer in 1948. Her co-stars included the likes of Shirley Temple and Ronald Reagan. She then made a series of British B-feature films; mostly crime films.
From January 2008, retailers will not be able to restock with 150W incandescents. 100W bulbs will go in 2009 and 40W bulbs in 2010. But be warned, some supermarket chains are planning to abandon incandescent bulbs in favour of dimmer, vastly more expensive fluorescents much sooner.
The man who gave the nation TW3 and satire (a.k.a. a thinly disguised assault on the Tory establishment) has died at 76. He produced plays, including half a dozen by Keith Waterhouse, TV programmes and radio shows, and he has been a fixture on Radio 4 for the last 2 decades with his arty Loose Neds programme.
The man who wrote most of the theme tunes for BBC series currently on offer on digital TV has died at 79. The Last of the Old Fellers (a.k.a. Plastered On Summer Wine), Are You Being Served?, Yes, Minister, Morse, To The Manor Born; you name them, he wrote them. He had a talent for being able to produce a theme tune quickly, and make it something became accepted as entirely appropriate.
There is a 6-week consultation period, in which the people who use these post offices can try to save them, but it is likely to be another labour party sham. The 'consultation' period used to be 12 weeks but the government decided that if it wasn't going to listen anyway, there was no point in dragging things out for 3 months.
He lied about the Queen storming out of a photo session when he knew that the material had been cobbled together in the wrong order. "He saw nothing wrong with TV faking things and his head came off in a swirl of bogus moral indignation," an insider commented. His boss could also face the chop for her part in the general flight from the truth at the BBC.
Too old to rock 'n' roll, too young to die; that was the situation for Sir Menzies Campbell, who was sacked from his party's leadership after 562 days. At 66, and even older than scotch gordon, he was deemed too much of a dinosaur by ambitious juniors, who blamed him for a disastrous slide in the opinion polls. He did okay at his party conference but he went from Ming to Minger in a day when the rats started revolting.
The deaths of over 90 patients from the superbug C. difficile on his watch ensured the departure of this top man in the Maidstone & Tunbridge Wells hospital trust. He blames the government's targets for taking his attention away from the job of ensuring proper hygiene in his hospitals, but he could face criminal charges for his gross negligence.
The government scam to sell of the frequencies used by analogue TV services has begun. By 2012, everyone in the country will have been obliged to stump up for digital TV via a set-top box and a new aerial, cable or satellite. Meanwhile, the government is at it behind the scenes, flogging off the redundant airwaves to its mates and setting up a parallel scam with analogue radio, foisting vastly inferior digital audio onto a nation used to high-quality VHF radio.
The writer, broadcaster and former Punch editor has died at 69; an age which begs one of his jokes. He was a bright lad from humble origins, who could have become an academic if he had not been seduced to a career on the humorous side of life.
The creator of Boysie Oakes has died at 80. The Liquidator was the first of John Gardner's 50+ works of fiction and the first of 8 featuring a guy who was as crap at being a secret agent as he was at getting his end away. Mr. Gardner wrote 2 excellent books featuring Professor Moriarty in the 1970s. Those still waiting for the 3rd member of the trilogy will be relieved to learn that it was finished just before the author's death and it will be published in due course. |
LOST & FOUND Lost : one bottle. Finder please contact scotch gordon, 10 Downing Street, London SW1. Not much chance of a reward. |
|
The rump Home Office is dropping a promise to catch more serious criminals. Why? because the split-off Justice Ministry, prop. jack 'have-a-go-hero' straw, doesn't have enough prison places for an influx of deserving customers.
|
![]()
A reader asks: "We still haven't filled in the bogus survey which our MP sent out. Does the fact that the prime monster bottled out of calling a general election mean we don't have to bother now, as Mr. Stunnell won't be bothered about getting himself noticed until 2009?"
|
The Japanese Grand Prix was held at the soggy Fuji International Speedway, where the late James Hunt won his championship 31 years before. The organizers started the race, with rookie championship hopeful Lewis Hamilton (British) on pole, behind the safety car. Every team, and the commentators, were told that the cars had to be wearing Xtreme wet tyres.
|
The Department for Transport's latest gimmick is a 20 mph for residential areas. But the DfT's own statistics show that the rate of fatal or serious accidents is 17% in 20 mph zones as opposed to 13% in 30 mph zones. But as the DfT has a long history of falsifying statistics, especially to prove that speed cameras are for saving lives not just extracting cash from motorists, no doubt the accident rate numbers will be swapped around 'accidentally' in the near future. |
|
There are so many Poles in Britain that their prime monster & the leader of his opposition are coming here to try to fire up the faithful as their general election on October 21st approaches. Apparently, Britain has become 'a crucial Polish constituency'.
|
![]() FOR SALE Fistometer : one careful owner, hardly used. Would suit someone making early preparations for the 2009 general election. All genuine offers considered
Apply: Romiley Electoral Materials, 42b, Riverside Avenue. |
![]() | ![]() | ||||
| |||||
![]() | ![]() |
| |
top | Created for Romiley Anarchists' League by workers in revolt against oppression. Sole © RAL, 2007. Free web counters are available from www.digits.com |