26.8.99
The 'lions and donkeys' quote comes from World War 1 when our
soldiers were lead into certain slaughter by the dimwhit officers
in charge. It's amazing really the positions that
some people rise to . 'Leaders' they're called or 'managers'
out of the armed forces.
When you think of it, these football managers are among the most
highly paid managers of people in the world. They have tremendous
resources at their disposal and when they turn up for work and
produce anything like a mediocre to good performance up to 80,000
people might chant their name and worship the very ground they
walk on. These people must be innovative superstars,
veritable Gods of the planet who can perform absolute miracles
close to turning water into wine... Or are they?
Now we have no complaints about our man Martin, he really is someone
who is coming up with the goods and he has given us the finest
Leicester City team ever.... and if anyone would like to prove
me wrong here I'd love to hear from them.
Arsene Wenger is pretty good too, he's efficient and 'gentleman
like' if a little over methodical, but then that's the Europeans
for you.
Vialli at Chelsea seems to be able to 'handle it' at the top of
the tree too.
I admire Graham Taylor's integrity and Jim Smith's honesty but
beyond that you're struggling really.
You might say I know very little about what goes on in football
but I've got a pair of eyes and ears and I have an opinion which
as a football fan is as worthwhile as anyone's although people
'in football' might call me a punter or a spectator and really
only pretend to value me as they rip me off on the way to their
next million.
But let's look at a couple of 'top blokes' shall we in the shape
of Ruud Gullitt and Kevin Keagan.
Let's start with Ruud - well he's spent £22m., has
a fanatical support who fill the ground every game and yet his
team(which it now is) is joint bottom of the league, unable to
dispose of the most mediocre of opposition, despite sometimes
having a two goal start .Getting back to this man management
thing, let's look at a couple of his manoeuvres in the recent
past.
When the players came back for pre-season training one of his
England Internationals, Rob Lee, was not invited to be included
on the team photo and not even given a squad number, just like
that - no explanation at all. That was very hurtful,
arrogant and frankly stupid since he doesn't have another player
in midfield who can tackle a paper bag.
He also decided to sell the (Opta statistically) best
player in the Premier League, Dietmar Hamman, to one of his rival
teams to finance some expensive non entities he wanted to bring
in.
Meanwhile Rob Lee's mate Alan Shearer incensed at his new managers
arrogance has a blazing row with him(allegedly) and his form slumps
dramatically. Whatever you think of Shearer, he's a goal scorer,
the club captain, and the captain of his country and it's
vital to have someone like him motivated and 'with you'.
So he drops Shearer for a local derby match against Sunderland
along with his pal Duncan Ferguson. He sits them both on the bench
and ignores them while his team flap away at the opposition. Then
when they're beginning to lose it and getting into dire straits
he puts the subs on. Now because his team cannot defend they lose
the match and what does he do? Take full responsibility?
No! He then proceeds to blame the two subs,
both central strikers in fact, for losing the match. He doesn't
do this in private he does it on national TV and then flies off
back to Holland.
Are these the actions of an exceptional manager of people?
Now let's turn to Kevin Keegan, presumably the best manager in
England since that is the job he has - the manager of England.
But if you look through his squad there are all sorts of peculiarities:
Stuart Pearce aged 37 at left back when he is considered too slow
for that position at his club West Ham. Michael
Owen and Gary Neville both injured and only just in light training.
Sick note Anderton who can't command automatic
selection at Spurs. David Seaman - injured; Ian
Walker - very dodgy keeper; Chris Sutton can't score,
Michael Philips and Kieron Dyer unproven commodities.
Phil Neville?
As a Leicester City fan I must point out to the world a couple
of omissions from Kev's England squad:
1. Steve Guppy a proven passer and crosser of the ball from the
left side a rare jewel indeed.Statistically he's second only to
Beckham, he can now defend too and also cut in on his right foot
and score. What more does he have to do?
2. Emile Heskey: Last season when he was injured and out of sorts
Kev picked him for two games, this season now that he's shaken
off his injuries and has scored 4 goals in his last 3 outings,
Keegan decides not to pick him. It beggars belief.
So the next time you are a bit affronted by your boss's latest
initiative just thank your lucky stars that you haven't got this
pair of right charlie's at the helm. On a day when the GCSE results
are coming out I think Messrs. Gullitt and Keegan would find themselves
very firmly rooted at the bottom of the class - personally I wouldn't
even bother giving them a detention - I'd try somehow to just
move them on.
PS. Or does it depend on which team you play for when it
comes to selection for England? Is Emile being told
'Move to a 'big' club son and I'll then pick you.'
I don't know it's got me well and truly beat.