The opening exchanges showed us some play really neat,
Then Job, for the Boro, showed a very quick pair of feet,
His ball fell for Macca and, hard though he tried,
It was sent for a corner, by Cunningham, far side.

Play’s fairly even, with ‘Blues’ getting their share,
Their man waltzed past Queudrue as if he wasn’t there,
His ball into the box was really very good play,
But, safe handling from Schwarzer, once more saved the day.

The way that we’re defending is really not that good,
And Birmingham, I feel, are already smelling blood,
They’ve done all their homework and it certainly does show,
Boosted by their derby victory of just a few days ago.

They’re taking advantage for we’re giving them the space,
And some of Boro’s players seem, at times, to be in a daze,
The battle for mid-field we’re certainly not winning,
And I’m sure that, already, the Birmingham manager’s grinning.

A free kick for the visitors, just beyond the eighteen yards,
Immediately one could see there was real danger on the cards,
A dream ball in saw their man, just about to pounce,
But, again we saw Mark Schwarzer collect the ball first bounce.

The Blues have studied Maccarone; he’s not getting any room,
And the way we’re currently playing makes the manager really fume,
Massa won a corner, which was placed on Ugo’s head,
The ref. refused a hand-ball: he was right, it must be said!

A wonder ball from Ugo, found Szilard Nemeth racing in,
He could have squared to Macca or to Job; but both remained unseen,
Perhaps it was the pressure now, to score for his own side,
Sadly, he miscued and sent his effort flying wide.

Geremi took a great free kick, which landed on the net,
But, was it a goal attempt or cross? I really wouldn’t bet!
The referee then blew again and, unless I am mistaken,
He’d spotted something in the box and the kick was then re-taken.

The second kick finished up in goal but was instantly disallowed,
A narrow offside, it was quickly said, which didn’t please the crowd,
“Outrageous” was one word I heard; “A very narrow decision,”
The referee’s assistant was the man who got howls of derision.

Nemeth, flying in on goal, was clearly fouled by Purse,
For which he got a yellow when it might have been much worse,
Up steps French Franck immediately, as the tension starts to mount,
With the last kick cancelled out, will this one be made to count?

Five men placed in the visitors’ wall to keep French Franck at bay,
That mattered not and this was going to be the Frenchman’s glory day,
He struck it unbelievingly and top corner right it curled,
And Vaesen in the visitors’ goal was beaten to the world.

In absolute and total silence, the Blues fans sat there stunned,
For in a moment of sheer magic, their ‘keeper was outgunned,
And in that wondrous moment, Boro fans called out the news,
That their favourite Frenchman, Franck, had given Birmingham the blues,

Boro were then guilty, once again, of sleeping in,
As a ball into the box found Robbie Savage creeping in,
It was far too close for comfort and the Boro crowd was hushed,
Then relieved when it was realised that Savage, unlike him, had pushed.

Excellent work by Queudrue as Robbie Savage he did rob,
Then he delivered a stunning ball right to the feet of Job,
He let fly from twenty yards, just as one expected,
But it only earned a corner as it wickedly deflected.

Then came about an incident and the taking of more names,
And it looked to me that Ugo, was possibly adding to the flames,
The referee hadn’t seen it; he was in the wrong position,
But his assistant then advised him and he reached the right decision.

Savage was one man involved and we know what makes him tick,
But Macca, when the ball had gone, deliberately aimed a kick,
Discussion by the officials, delayed the game more than a minute,
Meant a yellow card for Macca but at least he was still in it.

The half is then concluded and it has been really scrappy,
And it’s clear to see as well that neither manager is happy,
Some strange refereeing decisions have almost brought these men to tears,
And they clearly can be seen apparently warming D’Urso’s ears.

The visitors started off again, attacking down the right,
A good ball in found John and he attacked with all his might,
Fortunately for the Boro fans the ball went flying really wide,
Relief for ‘keeper Schwarzer, standing well to the wrong side.

Boro on attack again and looking for their second,
Which was proving more elusive than anyone had reckoned,
Job lifts one o’er the top seeking to make Maccarone’s day,
But once again our man was foiled when Purse nudged him well away.

Maccarone with the ball for half the field he carried,
Greening let one really fly, which the ‘keeper then just parried,
It must have been from thirty yards that this shot on goal was struck,
He caught it sweet: a terrific strike: but really such bad luck.

A lovely ball from Geremi was bound for Joseph Job,
He couldn’t quite get to it, as Savage had time to rob,
But Boro are now fighting hard, though easy it is not,
This game, please do believe me, is still in the melting pot.

Nemeth has just signalled that he’s in severe distress,
A situation which the management must immediately address,
His hamstring’s gone; he leaves the field, to a wonderful ovation,
To be replaced by Alen Boksic, our international Croatian.

Referee Andy D’Urso finds himself once more in the news,
Booking Cisse and Alen Boksic to a chorus of loud boos,
That’s six names so far in the book in a game that’s not been dirty,
The inconsistency’s just a joke: no wonder managers get shirty!

Uncertainty by the Boro now; how very slack we’re getting!
Allowing Cisse his free kick which landed in the netting,
That will be seen by ‘Blues’ as yet another appetiser,
For them this game is far from dead: they want an equaliser.

The defensive play by Stockdale was truly brilliant, I’d say,
But the visiting fans are happy: their team has had more of the play,
Just look at manager, Bruce, as he wears a deep, deep frown,
Unable to fully comprehend how his team is one goal down.

Joseph Job is taken off and Luke Wilkshire now can try,
To take the game to Birmingham and lighten the darkened Boro sky,
For if we’re really serious, and that is what’s been said,
We must, at least in home games, put the likes of Birmingham to bed.

A more direct ball in from Birmingham then took a wicked bounce,
Schwarzer fumbled and then grabbed it as Horsfield waited there to pounce,
Had he been that bit more active and a little bit more alive,
He may well have struck lucky as the ‘keeper set to dive.

Brilliant play by Macca led to Boksic shooting wide,
Now we’re under such great pressure that there’s nowhere left to hide,
Then the referee has signalled that four minutes are added on,
And Boro fans in their thousands have chewed their nails down to the bone.

Yet another great ‘Blues’ ball into Boro’s area is tossed,
And I’m finding it impossible to write with fingers crossed,
We’re hanging on by the finger tips and living on the edge,
We’ll never again suffer quite like this; on this I give my pledge!

All Boro hearts are racing; you’d cut the tension with a knife!
But every Boro player out there is really fighting for his life,
Boksic had great chances but, sadly, every one did fail,
But that moment of sheer French magic had finally got us out of jail.

I’m ‘travelling’ at this moment with my very good friends from Lincoln,
And as they’re driving home again, I just wonder what they’re thinking,
As for me, and today’s stressful times, well, I’ve already forgotten them,
I’m looking forward to three more points, away, next week, at Tottenham.

My very good friend, David, will have surely shed a tear,
As he heard what happened earlier to that team beside the Wear,
And finally to Mr. D’Urso, who once more filled the crowd with rancour,
Did you know? I believe it’s true; that this referee’s a Banker.