Both experience and youth, in what seems a decent mixture,
Are named for tonight’s opening Carling Cup fixture,
And Ugo Ehiogu returns to captain the side,
In a game that they really should be taking in their stride.

As long as we don’t do anything silly,
On a night that is blustery and awfully chilly,
We’ll have more than enough; I feel sure it’s agreed,
To overcome Coventry and ‘old’ Peter Reid.

In the circumstances it seems like a half-decent crowd,
And, within just two minutes they are all roaring loud,
The defence will find it extremely difficult to explain,
And Nemeth won’t score more easily in this campaign.

A comedy of errors after Downing’s shot was parried,
Left Nemeth a simple tap-in as defenders all were harried,
The ‘keeper, Steele, was punished hard for being awfully tardy,
Reminiscent of old comedies featuring Laurel and pal Hardy.

Downing forced a corner, with the Blues all looking nervy,
Although eventually cleared they were really topsy-turvy,
Then an aimless sort of cross, Carlo Nash could easily clutch,
We’ve played about twelve minutes and that’s the ‘keeper’s first real touch.

Accelerating in on goal, Downing has a probe,
That finds its way immaculately to the feet of Joseph Job,
His shot was well defended to frustrate the situation,
Then the wasted corner brought about nought but exasperation.

We hadn’t long to wait, in a game that we’re dictating,
For evidence, if needed, of the Blues capitulating,
With the ‘keeper going walkabout, a move he’ll much regret,
Morrison had the simple task to find the empty net.

Veteran Colin Cooper had gone right up in attack,
His deep cross picked out Morrison, who was standing at the back,
Defence was simply woeful; in a really dreadful fix,
And Bernie said he’d eat his hat if the Boro don’t score six.

Ugo Ehiogu’s important block; defending really stout,
Saved the Boro’s face after Chris Riggott was caught out,
He deflected Johnson’s shot, as the ball was goalwards bound,
And a sigh of huge relief was then heard throughout the ground.

So, the first half was so comfortable; no contest, to be true,
Now the Boro must be professional and really turn the screw,
The goals were almost gifted and there’s no way the Blues can rally,
It’s up to Boro now to go back out and up the tally.

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Downing is now rested, giving Graham his home debut,
An ideal opportunity, from what we’ve seen hereto,
He comes highly recommended for his scoring aptitude,
So this evening’s brief encounter seems to me so very shrewd.

The second half’s started scrappy, like the proverbial damp squib,
If I described it otherwise I’d be telling one huge fib,
It requires that little spark now, to set the game alight,
As a footballing spectacle it’s certainly not a pretty sight.

Cooper, fed by Wilson, went on a run to make his mark,
Then his shot, though wide of target, was reminiscent of Ayresome Park,
Gudjonsson’s off for Suffo as Coventry seek some inspiration,
But it’s too late, I’d suggest, for a realistic transformation.

After Nash had punched well clear there came a very brave intervention,
When Eddie Johnson felt the pain in a place one mustn’t mention,
‘Cold’ and ‘brass monkeys’ spring to mind so, without further ado,
I’ll close this by confirming that, at the last count, there were two.

Coventry had a free kick saved by Carlo Nash and then,
He released the ball to Joseph Job, who ran into three men,
Caught in two minds, apparently, in his last work of the night,
For he’s now being replaced by McMahon to add to Coventry’s plight.

Doriva’s wonderful ball had the defenders in a stew,
It found its way to Danny Graham, who still had lots to do,
He struck it low and very hard as the ‘keeper seemed to freeze,
Then he ran off with a huge smile as wide as the River Tees.

So now it’s three-nil on the night, with Coventry dead and buried,
And Peter Reid, totally justified, is looking awfully worried,
On this display, the side he has, is totally appalling,
And I wouldn’t be surprised if the ‘Grim Reaper’ came a’ calling.

Johnson staggers off, no doubt to languish in the tub,
And, afterwards, perhaps, to have a very gentle rub,
McSheffrey is their new man, to try and shore things up,
Though they know they’ll go no further in this season’s Carling Cup.

There’s a further change for Coventry as they seek some consolation,
Though, seriously, it’s nothing more than damage limitation,
Whing’s now on for Shaw with just minutes left to play,
In a game that’s seen the visitors in almost constant disarray.

Nemeth’s somehow injured and compelled to leave the pitch,
And JFH is chosen to compete the Boro switch,
The visitors’ defenders must be almost having kittens,
Though Jimmy seems reluctant to discard his hat and mittens.

It must be the longest warm-up that has ever been recorded,
And Jimmy never got around to doing what was ordered,
He appeared somewhat hesitant in the game’s last dying embers,
Then he vanished down the tunnel and that’s the last that he remembers.

Almost at the death the ball was headed out from goal,
And McMahon, for the Boro, showed most wonderful control,
With the ‘keeper soundly beaten and the crowd about to roar,
The ball then struck an upright so we couldn’t make it four.

Finally, the referee, Mr. Rennie, ran totally out of puff,
But he managed to find the strength to indicate enough’s enough,
So on a bitterly cold evening with an awfully stiff breeze,
It was three-nil to the Boro, who had won the game with ease.

The one thing is that Boro’s lads were totally professional,
But Coventry’s will have lots to ask when they attend confessional,
Had it been a boxing contest we’d have seen the towel thrown,
And manager, Peter Reid, had quite legitimate grounds to moan.

When the draw was later made it was worryingly revealed,
That the Boro will play Liverpool in their own back yard, Anfield,
I’m sure that will be a much harder nut to crack,
Though, hopefully, of the big guns, at least some will then be back.