Today at Old Trafford the weather’s awfully grey,
And Boro fans have travelled via the long motorway,
After successive defeats we must get back on the rails,
Then McClaren, to us all, a very young team unveils.

The Boro team’s a strange one, to the average onlooker,
No Hasselbaink or Queudrue and also no Viduka,
Then the youngsters take the field with their faces all beaming,
To face Man. United. There’s no harm in us dreaming.

A record crowd is present and you can almost hear the tills,
Get stuck in lads and don’t admire their smooth and silky skills,
It’s 25/1 for Rooney once again to score three goals,
But he’s never beaten Schwarzer who’s still leading in the polls.

The game gets underway under referee Rob Styles,
As I catch a glimpse of Fergie and I swear he almost smiles,
An early Downing cross and then a Morrison push-and-run,
Sadly faded out but at least he’d tried to take them on.

Great skill shown by Ronaldo as he seeks to run the show,
He picks out John O’Shea and he is also in full flow,
He let fly a mighty rocket as he led United’s posse,
And brought a wondrous save from the Boro’s own big Aussie.

Boro gave the ball away and, with Ronaldo running loose,
It looked, for all the world, that Boro’s head was in the noose,
With red shirts queuing up, it looked to me a scary sight,
Ronaldo chose to go alone and grazed Boro’s upright.

Neville whipped a great ball in, which Giggs then chose to fritter,
And he immediately acknowledged that he’d missed an absolute sitter,
This brought about two corners but, by dogged perseverance,
Parnaby won the day and brought about a Boro clearance.

We then saw Mendieta showing quite tremendous vision,
He almost picked out Nemeth with remarkable precision,
The ball was long and true, as from a modern rifle barrel,
Then it hit the greasy surface and skidded through to ‘keeper Carroll.

It’s great Boro play we’re seeing: we’re not in United’s pocket,
And the youngster, Stewart Downing, narrowly misses with a rocket,
With United backing off they were almost made to pay,
Though it narrowly cleared the bar, it wasn’t really far away.

Suddenly there was danger as Bolo Zenden sadly slipped,
The ball then fell to Rooney and in on goal he zipped,
But the shot had no direction and was, in truth, a Rooney duffer,
‘The Wonder of Wayne’ it wasn’t: I hope he doesn’t make us suffer.

Captain Gareth Southgate was then seen at his very best,
As Van Nistelrooy turned quickly and sought to put us to the test,
He was quick to spot the danger and was the first man to react,
And get the ball to safety as the Boro once more attacked.

A yellow card for Roy Keane, who chose to throw about his weight,
He certainly caught young Parnaby by arriving two days’ late,
“Disgraceful,” shouted Brownlee, who is never too subdued,
“It was deserving of a red, for it was filthy: it was crude.”

Rooney and Van Nistelrooy both sent good chances wide,
Then Boro found the net and it was totally justified,
Downing was the scorer and the Boro fans were astounded,
But Sir Alex, in his dugout, was left totally dumbfounded.

Morrison had a great ball fed to him by Stewart Downing,
He left the Argentine for dead and Sir Alex deeply frowning,
Then he whipped it back across the goal: I can hardly comprehend,
And Downing lashed it home before United’s Stretford end.

Parnaby, sadly, leaves the field; his play’s been really super,
His place is being taken, by Boro favourite, Colin Cooper,
With United looking stunned and with their finishing rather dire,
Sir Alex will be preparing to make use of his ‘hair dryer.’

The first half was magnificent: let no-one be mistaken,
And United leave the field of play, looking rather shaken,
Some had expected Boro to be totally overrun,
But that hasn’t been the case although there’s still much to be done.

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The Boro’s great first half was most exhilarating,
Now United come out late and they're keeping us all waiting,
But caution is required: they’ll not want to lose face,
And there’s no doubt at all that they’ll now up the pace.

A terrific ball from Boateng picked out Mendieta,
Who had two great options and should have done better,
Nemeth & Zenden were both patiently waiting,
Then Mendi got it all wrong, which I found most frustrating.

Rooney forced a corner when a poor shot was deflected,
Then the Boro broke, from a ball not well directed,
Danger-man Ronaldo showed such great perseverance,
And it was left to Southgate to effect the final clearance.

Ronaldo lost the ball when displaying all his wiles,
And a free kick was awarded, in error, by Rob Styles,
It was a perfect opportunity, which Ryan Giggs undertook,
It was plucked from the air when Schwarzer read it like a book.

Boateng’s now in trouble as he’s lost to Nistelrooy,
He threads one to Ronaldo, United’s blue-eyed boy,
Riggott rescued Boro by intervening fearlessly,
And Schwarzer clutched the corner like picking apples from a tree.

Morrison’s run’s being cheered by all the faithful Boro fans,
This would not have been a part of manager Fergie’s pre-match plans,
Nemeth had a golden chance to put one if the sack,
But it totally lacked oomph and was really more like a pass-back.

Extreme United pressure is currently being applied,
And Gareth blocks Ronaldo’s shot by the use of his backside,
Then an absolute sitter’s missed by Ruud van Nistelrooy,
I wonder? Will he still remain United’s pride and joy?

What a move by Boro! It had the lot, including pace,
It ended up with Mendi, all alone, with time and space,
He’d time to pick his spot and the ball should have been stuffed,
But it flew up high, above the bar, and the opportunity was fluffed.

He knows he should have scored to put the game well out of sight,
But he’s done his share today to try and add to Man. U’s plight,
Now Fergie’s seen the danger and a change is made forthwith,
Defender John O’Shea will now give way to Alan Smith.

It’s the fingernails of Boro fans that are currently being eaten,
Nistelrooy heads against the bar with Schwarzer totally beaten,
Boro concede two corners and were very nearly caught,
Thanks to terrific teamwork, United’s efforts came to nought.

Schwarzer makes a great save: he’s certainly given every ounce,
And it’s just as well he did, for Rooney’s waiting there to pounce,
Then Ronaldo’s bit of magic, once more of the highest level,
Left a sitter that was missed by Man. United’s Gary Neville.

Boro will now make a change with many fans nonplussed,
Morrison’s been brilliant but he’s about to bite the dust,
McClaren’s the man who’s chosen to make the sacrifice,
But it is my fervent hope that Boro don’t now pay the price.

It took about a minute for the moment we’d all dreaded,
When, after more Ronaldo magic, the equalising goal was headed,
Alan Smith was left unmarked, alone in no-man’s land,
And his powerful downward header just evaded Schwarzer’s hand.

Neville fluffs yet another and Ferguson once more recoils,
For there’s just about a minute for the Boro to share the spoils,
And the final whistle blows: in Man. U’s works we’d thrown a spanner,
And Sir Alex looks like he’s lost a bob and only found a tanner.

The lads played with distinction and every man was very brave,
And I bet, behind closed doors, that Ferguson would rant and rave,
Every single Boro player can really hold his head with pride,
They brought away a point and can be totally satisfied.