The Preparation

It was an incredibly early start for Lindsey and all the girls involved, as they got up before 7am to get ready for their hairstyle appointment. This nearly failed to happen when the alarm clock didn't go off (allegedly). If they had all woken up at lunchtime, the day might have turned out slightly disappointing! The poor hairdressers then had to deal with this huge group of customers. By the time they were finished it seemed reasonable to phone Dave to make sure he was getting ready. Bad mistake - Dave has never got up early on a Saturday and the small fact that this was his wedding day was not enough to avoid the inevitable grumpy response. Despite finally agreeing that the day was important enough to get up for, he still managed to go back to bed for half an hour. Typical!

The girls then began the long process of applying their make-up, and further destroying the ozone layer with aerosols. Lindsey's mother provided her quality bacon sandwiches (making Dave jealous for missing out). As everyone got ready, each mirror became a priceless piece of equipment, and fights over them were narrowly avoided! Meanwhile, the men were doing fine until it got to tying the cravats. They had no idea how to do them properly and desperately called out for any nearby women to help. The sight of adult men being dressed by their grandmother and best man's girlfriend was a pitiful one! Dave was upset at having to tuck his shirt in for the first time in 15 years.
 

On The Way

The men took so long getting ready, that they run out of time, preventing them having several drinks to calm their nerves. This was partly because they were forced into doing some cheesy photographs in the garden. Dave and several others then got into a huge, black, Lincoln limousine. Lindsey and her dad travelled in a long white limo with an extra wide door, which made it easier to get out without spoiling her dress. And no, the car was not designed for Rik Waller!
 

And So, It Begins...

On arrival at Springfield House, Dave had to nervously wait around while pretending he was not nervous at all. Then disaster - the bar wasn't open! Only minutes to go and still nothing to calm him down. Just when he was about to run away and hide, the bride arrived and he was urged back indoors. The guests seemed to be enjoying themselves though. After one of the worst weeks of weather ever seen in summer (even by normal British standards), we were amazed to find our day blessed by sunshine. The weather was great and everyone milled about in the gardens. Even the smell of cow dung from the previous day had gone away!

Once everyone had took their places in the main room, the bride and her party entered. She was led by her nephews as pageboys in kilts, her nieces as flowergirls and a whole bunch of her friends as bridesmaids. It was quite a sight, but nothing compared to the bride herself. She was wearing a beautiful, flowing, ivory-coloured dress, finished off with a long veil and golden tiara. The ceremony got under way and amazingly, nobody fainted or forgot their words. Even the rings hadn't been forgotten. The guests managed to resist the temptation of shouting "stop", when the registrar asked if anyone "knows of any good reason why these two should not be joined..." And so, the service came to an end, with the declaration of the new husband and wife and the all important kiss. After this, the register was signed, though Dave's signature was just a shaky mess. Lindsey's signature always looks like a shaky mess so it didn't matter.
 

The Aftermath

Everyone then relaxed and enjoyed a good meal, all except Dave who was mentally revising his speech for half an hour. The location of the wedding also prevented the groom from buying some much needed KFC! As the ceremonial cake cutting was done, the groom got his first married sight of Lindsey wielding a large knife. He made a mental note, to never get her angry in the future. The speeches began with Fred Bradford (father of the bride), who reminded us of Lindsey's desire to open the window of the plane one time - when it was in mid-flight! Dave then did his speech and after complementing his bride, reminded her that her duty was to serve him and that a good wife knows her place. (I was only kidding - no letters of complaints please). Paul, the brother of the groom, then did his best man's speech and produced some very embarrassing old photo's for everyone's amusement. He also asked guests to return any keys they had for Lindsey's house - a large number of men duly obliged). Overall, a great ceremony and it all went to plan.

Everyone was then free to enjoy the gardens and the warm sunshine, while the photographer did his stuff. We actually experienced what it feels like to be famous as at one point, as about 20 people, armed with cameras, stood in a long line taking pictures. Whichever way we looked, there was another camera - scary. We had to virtually glue on our smiles after a while. We had sore face muscles for days after that! There were some great shots though, and of course we got the pageboys to lift their kilts to flash their undies (which had 'Callum' and 'Kyran' printed on them in big letters.) Dave tried to lift Lindsey's dress up for a look, but she was having none of it.
 

Party Time

The Evening Reception took place back in our home town of Fleetwood at a huge club. The night really got going with the first dance of the bride and groom to 'Faith of the Heart' by Russell Watson. Very embarrassing doing it, of course, but it goes down well. At least we didn't choose something like 'Agadoo' or the 'Birdie Song'. Now that would be tragic. Everyone then took part in lots of drinking, bad dancing, overeating, and some abysmal attempts at karaoke. The young pageboys had the best time as they sneakily went around collecting money off people and ended up richer than anyone else in the place. To Dave's relief, his dad didn't dance on any tables, which is unusual for a wedding. Sadly, some line-dancing fans tried to inflict their form of 'dancing' on the rest of us. Dave had to tell the DJ to stop it quickly before they drove all the other guests away from the place. Meanwhile Lindsey still managed to dance in her dress, though she was unceremoniously dumped to the floor when Dave tried to spin her round. As the evening ended, the new husband and wife, left to spend the night in the local hotel. (sorry to anybody who was in room 16 by the way).

Three days later on the 30th of July, it was time to fly off to Cyprus for the honeymoon. It was a fantastic day and ended up being a dream wedding. Thanks to all guests who attended and for all our messages and gifts.

A list of all the people and organisations involved can be found here. Our guests are listed here

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