One Last Kiss

• RATING:           PG-13
• CATEGORY:     Angst. POV
• PAIRINGS:        Daniel/Share
• CONTENT WARNINGS: Sexual situations
• SPOILERS:       CotG
• AUTHOR'S NOTE: I don’t think there are nearly enough Daniel/Share stories, so I’ve tried to get into her head a bit.

 

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Daniel. Your name is my one thought. And the memory of our love is the one thing that gives me strength to carry on fighting the demon that has stolen my body – the demon that keeps me from you.

 

I miss you my Daniel. I wish we could go back, to how we were, when we were happy. Before they came and destroyed what we had.

 

First O’Neill and the others from your homeworld, and then Apophis.

 

I let you go alone with O’Neill and the others, knowing that I would serve no purpose there. You were so excited about that place, about what you said it represented. You wouldn’t notice whether I was there or not. I know you tried to share it with me when you first found it, to explain what you thought it meant, but I couldn’t share in your excitement, and I could see the disappointment in your eyes when you realised that I was merely bored by it, so I decided it would be better if I didn’t come. That was the worst choice I have ever made.

 

I kissed you goodbye, to make sure you remembered that no writings, no great discovery, nothing is more exciting than our love. I was jealous of your work, of the people from your homeworld, of the woman with hair and eyes the same colour as yours, my Daniel. So I wanted you to take with you a part of us, a memory of our love.

 

I didn’t know then that that last kiss would become my memory of our love as much as yours, my Daniel.

 

When the demons took me to that place, shut me away with the other women, dressed us in beautiful clothes, such as I have never dreamed of in my life, I thought we were going to be given to the warriors as playthings, to be used for their pleasures.

 

So I sat and remembered our life together, how good it was, how happy we were. I held on to that last kiss we shared, and remembered our love, our passion. I thought that if I could remember the goodness we had between us Daniel, then I would be able to survive the warrior’s torture and rape, and wait for you to come and save me Daniel. Because I knew you would try to find me, to save me, to save Skaara, to save us all.

 

You did before. You came through the Chappa’ai and saved us from Ra. And I loved you from the moment I first saw you. You were so different from any man I had ever seen, with your hair the colour of bleached cotton, and your eyes the colour of the midday sky. So I said I would be the offering to appease the God, but then you did not want me, and I was so confused, because you seemed to like me, but you did not want me.

 

And then later, after the first time that we lay together, you explained to me why you did what you did, that it wasn’t because you didn’t want me, but as a mark of respect. That you wanted it to be my choice, not that of my father or the elders.

 

I knew you were different to other men, but I did not understand why until I talked to the other wives. You valued my thoughts. You wanted me to tell you what I thought about things, even in front of the men, and if I disagreed with you Daniel, you would listen and sometimes you would do what I said, even if it was not what you believed to be correct.

 

And when we lay together, my pleasure from our love was as important to you as your own. When I was a child, I had heard the women talking, and they did not gain any pleasure from lying with their husbands. I was scared of the pain that I heard would come, but I was happy to lie with you because I wanted to make you happy. And then when I felt so much pleasure, I knew I was the luckiest woman alive. That no wife on Abydos could possibly be as happy as I was with you my Daniel.

 

You were so handsome with your eyes the colour of the summer sky and your hair the colour of the desert sand. You were so clever. You were so brave. And you loved me. Every time you looked at me with so much love in your eyes my heart swelled so much in my chest it hurt.

 

And now we are parted by the demons. And one is in my head, controlling my actions. And I cannot do anything but fight her. And I fight her by remembering our love, and that one last kiss. It makes her angry, and I am glad that it makes her angry, because just for a small while I am in control, and not her.

 

When she lies with Apophis, I remember our love, when we used to take our blanket and make love under the stars, in the warm night air of Abydos. And it makes her angry, and she takes no pleasure from lying with her Lord. And I am happy, because their joining is spoiled by the beauty of our lovemaking. She cannot take pleasure from another man with my body. I will not let her. This body will only have pleasure from you, my Daniel.

 

But Daniel I’m sorry. I’m so sorry, because I never told you the one thing that would have made our happiness complete. I should have told you when I first knew, but I was going to save it, to tell you on the anniversary of the day we first met, to make it special.

 

But now I can’t. I never will. Because now there is nothing to tell you. Ammonet made sure of that. The moment she entered my body, she knew and she made certain that it would not happen.

 

She killed our child, my Daniel. She destroyed it so that there would be nothing left that was ours. But she was wrong.

 

We still have our love. A love that will never die and will go on across the stars, joining us together no matter how far we are apart. A love that gives me strength to carry on, and the hope that you will find me and save me, one day.

 

A love that is held in the memory of that one last kiss.

 

 

* fin *

Love it? Hate it? Let me know either way!

Athene