Funny quotes during gameplay

- I hate arrogant people except myself
- Runaway brain - never come back
- Central America is not in Brazil
- I'll tell you everything you know
- his hair is shaven bald
- Even this night will end one day
- opponent is prune, sorry, prone (Shadowrun Modifiers)
- the thick is book enough
- ... with his sniper magic (Tremere) [this is actually not a real quote. The player (German) tried to translate Hedge Magic and came up with "Heckenschuetzenmagie" in German. "Hecke" means hedge, "Heckenschuetze" is the proper translation for sniper, a "shooter behind a hedge"]
- the traces disappeared without a trace (Scout)
- I hit him protectively
- the white man with an old beard, ... er
- on a plain plain
- OOC: Make an Etiquette roll, you idiot!
- cop fiverpieces, er, five copperpieces
- OOC: Who told you to put the teapot in my dice pool? (Player puts pot on table between dice)
- This Katana cost $ 3,000 and now it doesn't hit!
- Vampire 1: I have to conduct some scientific research. Vampire 2: What? Now? In the middle of the night?
- this obvious doctor
- Earthdawn: Were the Orcs normal? - As normal as Orcs can be
- Harold Johnson (Dragonlance 5th Age) at EuroGenCon 96: The Sword of Smith to kill the Super Dwarf (talking about magic weapons in AD&D)
- Shadowrun: Mage who was recovering from a Mana Bolt: I need something for my headache -- Shaman who had been shot in the face: I need something for my faceache.
- The agitator is agitated
- Earthdawn: I won't burn Karma for rats! (the rats were pretty big, though)
- ED: Orks are born naturally wise
- I wank him over the head -- GM: Yuck! -- I mean, whack him over the head
- ED: I don't know if I like DIS place
- ED: Why don't we just quit meeting people? (Human Swordmaster after the party had run into several traps in a row)
- OOC: You foul fiend! [the GM's little son threw a player's dice from the table]
- GM: Make a perception chest, ... test, ... check, whatever, roll yer dice
- GM: Don't forget the pent tegs. Player: Pentex? GM: I mean, tent pegs
- ED: The Obsidiman sings along in a gravelly voice
- ED: "Here's one I prepared earlier!" - magician casting a spell which was stored in a spell box
- That sucketh!
- GM: You've got a David-Lynch-type head wound
- In a Mage: Sorceror's Crusade (Order of Reason) game: GM as guard: Password? Celestial Master: Vorsprung durch Technik!

The following quotes were submitted by Roger Burton West:

NPC: These are maps of the planets.
Dumb PC: But everyone knows the world is flat!
Smarter PC: Yes, and so are the maps.

Player: Take a look inside the box.
GM: It won't open. It's a very magical box which won't open until the GM has decided what's inside it.

Reporter PC: I'll try to interview them while they're interrogating me.GM: Roll as many dice as you like. Just tell me which one's your Body save.
PC: You fall over when he shoots you and I'll shoot him back.
PC: I'll get the implanted cellphone. With an answering machine for when I'm out of my head.

PC: You greasy biker harlot!
Other PC: Excuse me, I'm not greasy.

GM: Their descendants moved here about a century ago.

GM: You see a glass sphere, five feet square.

PC: We're mysterious benefactors of no fixed abode.

NPC: Good evening. I say good evening, for this is to be the dawn of your life. Er.

PC: The business with the garlic, holy water and rowan-wood stakes was entirely a misunderstanding, milady.

PC: Pest exterminators, ma'am. Someone told us this house was infested with Yakuza.

PC: Once we fireball the place, no-one will know it wasn't us.

PC: Please remain calm. There's no cause for alarm. There is cause to be nervous, and he's one of them.

GM: He has to keep the ancestral sword so that his family doesn't lose its dishonour.

PC: Once I'm unconscious, I count as a damsel in distress.

PC: You can't throw us out of this coffee bar! It's our secret headquarters!

GM: These are characters, Mike, not hit points.

And, of course:

Player: Seduction counts as a pickup skill.

Thanks a lot, Roger!


If you happen to have a similar list, mail me, I'll incorporate the quotes in my list.

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